Too Late To Say I Love You (Gwen White and Jared) novel Chapter 17

Jared Crawford was dispirited.

He neither cared about his company nor left his room nor ate. Nobody could get him to leave his room — it did not matter who tried to persuade him.

Jared found a diary among Gwen’s belongings, and he had been crying and laughing at it for a few days.

He sat on the ground below the windowsill and held the wooden figures that were carved by Gwen. Once again, he flipped through her diary, which felt extremely heavy to him.

……

[23 September 201X.

[Happy!!!

[Today is the day Jared and I are getting married. He’s on his way to pick me up, and I’m so happy yet nervous that I don’t know what to do. Mom suggested that I keep a post-marriage diary. She has kept one in the past, and she only stopped writing when Dad passed away.

[I’ve decided to keep this diary, and I’ll write until either me or Jared dies one day!

[It never occurred to me that I’ll actually become Jared’s wife one day, so I thought I was dreaming when Mom told me!

[Mom and Grandpa Crawford said that Jared wanted to marry me on his own will. Although it sounds unbelievable, I’m truly happy. I’ll definitely be a good wife in the future, and I’ll take great care of him!]

……

[24 September.

[It turns out that Jared didn’t want to marry me — it was Grandpa Crawford who forced him to choose.

[If I knew the truth behind our marriage, I would’ve never agreed. I could never force him to do things that he doesn’t want to, but this time…

[He really dislikes me, so much so that he’s not willing to admit that he was the one who slept with me last night. He even said that I cheated on him…

[Everyone in Fuzhou knows that I’ve loved him for ten years, so how could I have cheated on him?

[It was clearly he who slept with me last night. He might’ve been drunk, but I was sober. I saw it clearly that it was him, it was him!]

……

[25 September.

[Jared didn’t come home, I waited the whole night for nothing.]

……

[26 September.

[Jared still hasn’t come home. I went to his company to look for him, but the receptionist wouldn’t let me enter because I hadn’t made an appointment. I told her that I’m Jared’s wife, but she said that I’m daydreaming…

[I forgot that we got married without having a ceremony, and nobody knows because it wasn’t made known to the public.]

……

[27 September.

[Jared still hasn’t come home, but I bumped into him and Janice at the supermarket. It turns out that they’ve been living together.]

……

[28 September.

[Jared didn’t come home.]

……

Following that, there were many pages with the same words. From those words alone, Jared could feel how Gwen went from being excited at the beginning to having lost enthusiasm and finally became numb.

Jared’s tears dripped onto one of the pages, where it smeared the despairing words: “didn’t come home”.

He finally realized that Gwen had not asked for the marriage. She did not know his dad had forced him to make a choice, so she thought he had willingly married her.

Jared misunderstood her again.

……