Camp Closeted novel Chapter 54

I was running fast.

Running right after my palm met against Romeo's now reddened cheek, injecting adrenaline rush to pump all throughout my body as my nose gushed out blood.

The view of his shocked facial expression made me feel weird. I definitely didn't feel bad for slapping him since I believed that he deserved it. You insult me countless of times, treat me like actual shit, and then expect me to just be okay with it?

I'm not some doll he can just play with! All he's doing now is confusing me. He says so many things to me that hurts me and when he kisses me it feels like the complete opposite. That's not okay.

Does Romeo sort of like me or just using me as an experiment? He did say I wasn't his type so why did he just kiss me again? These past few experiences with Romeo have done nothing but make my stomach hurt from all the butterflies and my brain hurt from all the confusion.

I'm so confused..

I didn't bother looking down at my blood soaked sleeve as my legs seemed like they had their own mind. I haven't ran like this in a long time. The last time I ran this fast was when I joined track back in sophomore year, this could maybe even be faster.

Am I running because I hate Romeo or am I running because I secretly like him?

Well whatever the answer is, it won't be answered, at least in a very long time, or maybe not even answered at all.

The first thing I saw when I entered the cabin was Benny dancing energetically to himself, large shopping bags spread throughout his bed.

"Benny?" My voice rapidly caught his attention as he quickly turned to face me, a wide smile plastered on his face.

"Holy shit, Micah!" He cheered, biting his lip as he skipped towards me, clapping his hands. "Guess who's now a stylist and just went on a shopping spree, courtesy of my sugar daddy Keanu!" He cackled like a witch, making me laugh out loud too.

"What?" I asked, amused. "You got the job?"

"Yes bitch!" His small hands quickly grabbed onto mine to pull me towards his bed that was filled with so many clothes. "Keanu wanted to celebrate so he brought my ass to the mall and bought me a whole bunch of shit while we were at the city." My mouth dropped as he just continued to cheer.

"What else did you guys do to celebrate." I teasingly wiggled my eyebrows at him.

"Fucked in the parking l-" Benny couldn't even finish his sentence as he already blasted out in complete laughter. "I'm joking, no he actually just took me out. We ate at a super cute café. The barista there was so fine! His name was Kai and he knows how to do foam art! I swear, some straight boys will be the death of me."

"You're so lucky! That must've been so fun!" I exclaimed amused, exploring the new outfits Benny will surely wear soon. "So you and Keanu are dating now?" I grinned.

Benny tried to hide his smile with his hand as he rolled his eyes at me. "Yea, I guess you could say we dating or whatever." He let out a high pitched laugh.

"That's so cute! I'm really happy for you guys!" I congratulated him. "Also, I knew you were gonna get the job! I don't even know why you were doubting yourself."

"Honestly, it was just overwhelming. I never thought I'd ever be in a spot like that and when it happened I was so happy." Benny continued to talk. "You know Micah, all my life I doubted myself. Having this opportunity felt so validating for me, you know?" He sighed as I just nodded my head in agreement.

"Yea." I simpered.

"No more questioning if I'm worthy, no more questioning whether or not I should even continue living." Hearing Benny open up such personal things to me honestly made me feel so grateful to have a friend like him. "I don't know, I just-for the first time in my life, I feel genuinely happy." He widely smiled, his chocolate brown eyes shimmering through his round yellow glasses.

I smiled back at him as his smile quickly diminished down. "For a happy person, your smile disappeared really fast." I slightly furrowed my eyebrows at him out of confusion at his sudden dryness from expression. "Are you okay?"

"Well." He began to speak a lot quieter. "One of the requirements for the job is to be able to travel anywhere and anytime-since you know, I have to style models before the fashion shows and stuff." My mouth slowly began to open as I think I knew where this was going.

"And?" My voice unconsciously came out as a whimper as he began to talk again.

"Meaning, I probably won't ever be coming back here anymore." He bit his lip as his eyes anxiously looked at me.

My head shook as I tried to process what he just said as hopeful as possible. "What? How? Fashion shows don't happen a lot, right? I'm sure you'll still be able to come back. You don't have to be gone forever, right Benny?" His lack of quick response and his drooping mouth was enough answer.

"I was given my traveling schedule right after I got the job." Benny brought himself closer to me as I didn't know how to feel. "I'll be flying to Milan next week, Paris right after that, Dublin, Prague, Barcelona, basically all of Europe. Vice is launching his fashion shows there before launching it here to create hype. I'll probably be required to stay around there for quite some time."

I took a second to respond as I just blinked my eyes at him. "Some time?"

"Months, maybe even years." Benny pursed his lips as I could've sworn I felt my ears perk up at what he just said.

"B-but you'll get day offs and vacations right?" I asked quietly, my tone heavily filled with growing emotions as I wished he would at least help me spark some hope of me seeing him again. "Meaning I'll see you again?"

"Honey, day offs are only for a day. Also, vacations only lasts for a week and are rarely given especially to people in my position. I probably don't have any vacations this year since I just started." He explained. "I don't wanna sound like a bitch, but Micah, I would rather spend my vacation in Europe instead of a place I've literally been stuck in since birth. I'm tired of seeing the same faces and the same places and the same fucking area every single day."

"You're right, I'm sorry." My furrowed eyebrows immediately softened as I quickly agreed to what he just said. He had a point. I agreed because I too would probably want to do the same also. "I-I probably sound selfish and sound like I'm not happy for the amazing job you just got, but I am Benny. I really am. I'm so proud and happy and excited for your future. It's just that, I want you to know that you're the very first true best friend I've ever had in my life and you mean the world to me at this point."

Benny's head quickly tilted at me as his face began to slowly crinkle. "You better stop, you're gonna make me show feelings and you know I hate that shit." I quietly laughed.

"It's true Benny." I just shrugged, my eyes beginning to blur. "I'm gonna miss you so much."

He quickly pouted as he threw his arms around me, hugging my neck tightly as I hugged him back. "I'm a miss your hoe ass too." He let out, quickly making me cry now. "If the stylists are given the chance to invite someone for the shows, you best be ready to check your mail." He let out, sniffing.

"Ugh, I'm not about to cry right now." I suddenly raised an eyebrow at him as I quickly wiped my tears away. "What about Keanu?" Our hug slowly broke off.

"Fuck him." He teased, all of a sudden beginning to laugh. "He doesn't give a damn about fashion. He cares more about sports and I don't wanna make him sit through a fashion show for 2 hours when he'd rather sit and watch a bunch of men play with some balls, okurr." He curled out his tongue, making me laugh out the incoming tears with him.

"But I'm not really into fashion either." I sighed deeply, running my hand through my hair.

"But that's different. Your my best friend and I'd rather have you there than anyone else." He quickly replied.