Life After the Storm novel Chapter 61

LILLY'S POV

There is so much to figure out why would I ever want to be alone with him? I can see the compassion in his eyes, but I don't care. I want to avoid being anywhere near him. Of course, I'm afraid to say the wrong thing, but I need to stop being afraid. I am strong, I know I am, I have to be for all that I have been through. I just wish that I felt that strength and maybe If I did I would be able to stand up and say what I really want to say.

I stay silent, not being able to speak, wondering why can't I Force the words out of my mouth. As he takes a step towards me, I take a step backwards, not wanting to be close to him. I can feel the mate bond making me want to be close to him, but I fight it. Even though I know that he is mine, I don't want him. There is nothing he can do to make me forgive all the wrong things that he has done to me.

I watch as he goes to speak to me, “Lilly, there's a lot that I am sorry for, but there are things that are more important. That needs to be dealt with now, not later. Lilly, you are now the Luna of the pack. We need to have a ceremony to make it official. I know that you probably don't want to, but our pack is in danger, and we need to make it as strong as possible.”

Even though I prefer not to speak to him, I know I have to. He has put me through so much, but he is right. We need to figure all this shit out. I really don't want Anyone else to get hurt. If I can help make the pack stronger and lead them in the right direction, it would all be worth it. Then maybe even take over as their alpha.

I can see the desperation in his face. I know he wants me to say something. I struggle with not knowing what to say. I don't want him to think that I will just follow what he says like his little puppet. I decide I'm not doing this for him. I'm doing this for Jayden and the pack members who need my protection. I can't allow others to get hurt because of me. I need to put my issues aside and figure out how to move on from here. Even though he is acting like he has forgotten all the terrible things he has done to me, I still remember all of it in detail.

I stand up straight and make myself speak the words that I don't really want to say. “Fine, I will have dinner with you but only to discuss what we need to do to protect the pack and that is it.”

I watch as a smile comes on his face, which makes my stomach turn. “Thank you, Lilly, I appreciate you accepting my invitation.”

“Just know Ivan, I'm only accepting to protect the pack, not because I want to have dinner with you.”