Chapter 4
That first night in the old house, I suddenly spiked a fever.
My forehead was burning. My whole body trembled.
I fumbled for my phone and called Mom.
“Mom… I have a fever…” My voice was so weak I could barely hear it myself.
There was a pause on the other end. Then I heard her say:
“There’s fever medicine in the house. Look for it yourself. Your sister just had surgery. She needs rest. Don’t make a fuss.”
Then she hung up.
I listened to the dial tone, and I felt colder inside than my body felt outside.
Rain started falling outside, drumming against the window like it was crying for me.
For the next week, I lay in bed alone. Fever came, fever went, fever came back.
When the housekeeper came to cook, she noticed something was wrong and finally took me to see a doctor.
From twelve to eighteen, I learned how to live alone.
Every parent-teacher conference, my seat was always empty.
But Sienna-who went to the same school-Mom and Dad showed up for her every single time.
Sometimes we’d pass each other in the hallway. Mom would awkwardly look away. Dad would pretend he didn’t see me.
For those six years, Freddie Miller was the only light I had.
He’d always climb over the low wall of the old house and sneak me little snacks.
He’d say, “It’s okay. Everything will pass.”
He’d say, “Scarlett, let’s both get into NYU.”
He’d say, “Once we’re in New York, no one can separate us.”
I believed him. I studied like my life depended on it.
The day the SATs results came out, I walked past a hotel downtown. A huge banner hung outside-bright, bold, impossible to
miss:
10.10
Adopted to Biological? Koon Your Golden Child-Scapegoat Out
2.9%
Chapter 4
“Congratulations to Sienna Jones on Her Acceptance!”
Mom and Dad stood at the entrance in formal wear, greeting guests with wide smiles.
Sienna stood between them, glowing like a real princess.
I stood across the street, watching a celebration that had nothing to do with me.
Turns out, even when your heart dies, it still hurts.
But it was fine. I’d be leaving them soon anyway.
When my acceptance letter arrived, I tore open the package with shaking hands.
But instead of NYU’s logo, I saw the emblem of UT Austin.
In that moment, my blood ran cold.
I thought back to how strange my parents had been acting a few days earlier.
They’d changed my college application!
I stormed into that house-the one I hadn’t been back to in years-and slammed the letter onto the coffee table.
“Why is it UT Austin?”
Mom’s tone was dismissive.
“What’s wrong with UT Austin? It’s close to home.”
My voice shook. “How dare you change my application?!”
“Because we’re your parents!” Dad walked out of his study.
“Your sister also applied to NYU. If you’re there in front of her, she’ll feel insecure.”
“Because of her. ALL BECAUSE OF HER?!” All the years of suppressed hurt finally erupted.
“Since I was a kid, everything’s been about her feeling insecure!”
“She snooped through my diary-she felt insecure.”
“She fell down the stairs-she felt insecure.”
“And now even my college choice makes her feel insecure!”
“Scarlett! Watch your tone!” Mom shot to her feet.
“What tone? What tone am I supposed to have?!”
Chapter 4
The tears came whether I wanted them to or not.
“You kicked me out when I was 12! Didn’t check on me for six years.”
“And now you’re destroying my future? Do you even deserve to be called parents?!”
“We raised you for eighteen years!” Dad’s face turned livid.
“Raised? You mean tolerated.” My voice cracked, hoarse with rage.
“Sienna’s your real daughter. I’m just a placeholder. A stand-in.”
“I wish you’d never adopted me at all!”
Slap-
My dad slapped me.
“Get out!” Mom pointed at the door, her eyes bloodshot. “If you hate us so much, then never come back!”
I ran out of that house. Stood in the rain and cried until I was soaked to the bone.
I kept asking myself-
Why don’t Mom and Dad love me?
Why was I adopted?
Why can’t I have my own real parents?
I cried until midnight. Then I snuck back to grab my ID.
But as I stood outside their bedroom, I heard them talking.
“We shouldn’t have lied to Sienna back then. Told her Scarlett was adopted.”
Mom’s voice was choked with tears.
“But what’s the point of saying that now?”
“The year Sienna disappeared, I was such a mess. I didn’t even realize I was pregnant with Scarlett.”
Dad sighed.
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