I Swear I Still Hate Him (Atlas Lawson) novel Chapter 175

Chapter 175

Atlas POV

Just like Rhys said, they were both completely wasted.

And somehow… adorable.

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Gia was slouched against the bar, blinking at Rhys like he’d personally offended her by arriving. Emery was a little quieter, but not by much. Her cheeks were pink, her eyes glassy, and there was this loose, sleepy smile on her face that made something in my chest go warm before I could stop it.

Rhys got to Gia first, sliding an arm around her waist just as she wobbled.

I stepped over and picked up Emery’s phone from the floor before someone kicked it across the bar.

“Thank y…” she started, then stopped cold.

Her green eyes widened the second she realized it was me.

“Atlas?”

“Hey, Em.” I handed her the phone. “Come on. Let’s go.”

She just looked at me for a second, like she was trying to figure out if I was real, then took the phone with both hands. I gave Rhys a nod and guided Emery out.

The drive back was mostly quiet. Emery sat still, hugging my jacket to her chest like it belonged there. Her face was still flushed from the drinks, and every so often she blinked slowly, like the world was taking a second too long to settle.

I turned on the radio just to fill the silence.

The second a song came on, Emery’s whole face lit up.

“I love this songgg,” she said, dragging out the last word.

Then she started singing.

“Timmme apartt annddd I’m still dreamin’ of the nigghhhttt on the beachhh…”

I had to bite back a smile.

She was way off-key. Not even close to the tune. But she sang like she meant every word, swaying a little in her seat, still wrapped up in my jacket like it was a blanket.

It was ridiculously cute.

If I wasn’t driving, I probably would’ve looked at her the whole time.

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Chapter 175

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When we finally got back, I parked and got out. I came around to her side just as she pushed the door open and tried to step out with way too much confidence.

“I’m fine,” she said immediately, before I even offered to help.

I nodded once. She made a face at me and took two determined steps in the wrong direction.

“Em,” I said, following after her. “Not there.”

She stopped, looked around, then let out a soft laugh and turned the right way. “Right. I knew that.”

“Clearly.”

We took the private elevator up to my penthouse, and by the time we got to the front door, Emery was leaning against the wall like standing had become a group project. I unlocked the door, and she wandered inside ahead of me.

“Hello, home,” she said to the empty apartment.

Then she swayed. I stayed close behind her, one hand hovering at her back just in case. She caught herself and kept going like nothing happened. When we made it into her room, she took one look at the bed and flopped onto it face-first with a muffled groan.

I stood there for a second, trying not to laugh. Then I went to her closet. It took longer than it should have to find something decent because apparently Emery owned a suspicious number of clothes that looked soft but wildly complicated.

Finally, I found a pink pajama set and held it up.

She rolled over and looked at it, then nodded with a sleepy smile. “Approved.”

I walked over and handed it to her. “Alright. I’m gonna turn around. Let me know if you need anything.”

She smiled again, taking the pajamas from me. “Such a gentleman.”

“Don’t ruin it.”

I turned my back and crossed my arms, staring at the wall while I listened to the rustle of fabric behind me. To keep my brain from wandering where it absolutely did not need to go, I started mentally running through hockey rules, line changes, defensive setups….anything remotely safe.

Then I heard her laugh.

“Um,” she said, “I have an issue, Atlas.”

“What kind of issue?”

She giggled. “You have to turn around to see it.”

Of course I did..

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Chapter 175

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I turned fully and found her sitting on the edge of the bed, pajama top buttoned completely wrong. One side was higher than the other, the fabric crooked enough to make it obvious she’d lost the fight with basic motor skills.

I smiled before I could stop it.

“Come here,” I said, stepping closer. “Let me help.”

She walked up to me and then stood still, watching me with heavy-lidded eyes while I fixed the buttons one by one.

I focused on that.

Only that.

Not the fact that she was looking at me like I was doing something far more intimate than fixing her shirt. Not the way she smelled faintly like shampoo and alcohol and Emery.

Just the buttons.

When I got to the last one, I stepped back fast enough to feel the space as relief.

“There,” I said.

She looked down at herself, then back up at me. “Thank you.”

“Yeah.” I cleared my throat. “You should get some sleep.”

She hesitated, then tilted her head.

“I…” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Can we go to the balcony? I’d like to sober up a little.”

I studied her face. She looked tired. Drunk. A little too soft around the edges. But also serious.

So I nodded. “Sure.”

We stepped out onto the balcony, and the night air hit us soft and cool. Emery moved toward the couch with that slow, careful kind of walk people had when they were trying very hard to prove they weren’t still a little drunk. She sat down, tucking one leg under herself, and I grabbed the blanket folded over the armrest and draped it over her gently.

“Thanks,” she said, her voice quieter now.

I handed her the bottle of water, then took the seat beside her, close enough to catch her if she swayed, far enough that I didn’t make things harder on myself than they already were.

The city stretched out below us, all lights and distance. Above us, the sky was dark and open, the clouds thin enough for the stars to break through.

For a while, neither of us said anything.

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Chapter 175

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We just sat there, listening to the quiet and the faint sounds of the city below, letting the night settle around

Then Emery sighed.

Her fingers tightened around the water bottle, and when she spoke, her face was already turning pink again.

“I’m sorry about last night.”

I turned my head and looked at her. “It’s fine, Em.”

She shook her head immediately. “No, it’s not.” She let out a small laugh, embarrassed and breathy. “I didn’t mean to snoop, I swear. I just got bored and thought I’d… you know… take a peek.” She glanced at me through her lashes. “Then I got distracted by your library, which, I have to say, is annoyingly impressive. And then your stupid organized shirts in your closet, which I may have been tempted to mess with a little.”

That pulled a smile out of me. Yeah, I noticed the shirt. And yeah, under normal circumstances, I probably would’ve fixed it right away. Instead, I’d left it exactly how she changed it. Because for some reason, knowing she’d touched something in my room made me not want to move it.

I leaned back a little, watching her ramble.

“And then,” she went on, words coming a little faster, “just when I was about to leave, you showed up unannounced…which, obviously, you don’t have to announce your arrival, it’s your home, that came out wrong…but what I’m trying to say is I freaked out and thought hiding in your closet was the best idea, which…” She flushed harder and looked down at the blanket. “It wasn’t.”

I bit back a grin. Then gave up and let it happen. I wanted to tease her too badly not to.

“On a scale of one to ten,” I asked, “how hot was it?”

Her eyes flew wide. “Atlas!”

I laughed under my breath.

She looked away, clearly fighting her own embarrassment. “I… well…” Her voice dropped. “If you want to go into that, you’d definitely score high.”

I paused for half a second.

Then the laugh hit me hard.

I bent forward a little, rubbing a hand over my jaw, trying to get it together and failing.

She scoffed like she was offended, but then she broke too, and before I knew it, we were both laughing, really laughing, the kind that steals your breath and makes your chest ache a little in the best way. It went on until we finally calmed down, the laughter fading into softer smiles and easier breathing.

Then she said it. So quietly I almost missed it.

“I missed this.”

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Chapter 175

The words landed harder than they should’ve.

I looked at her.

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“Me too.”

And I meant it.

Every damn bit of it.

We fell quiet again after that, the kind of quiet that didn’t feel awkward. Just full. Like the wasn’t empty anymore.

Then Emery suddenly looked up.

“Oh,” she whispered, eyes widening. “I just saw a shooting star. Quick-make a wish.”

I looked at her instead.

Didn’t even think about it.

“I wish this moment could last forever.”

She froze.

Completely still.

space

between us

Her face flushed again, deeper this time, and for a second I couldn’t tell if it was the cold, the alcohol, or me.

Probably all three.

I glanced away, rubbing the back of my neck. “Right. I forgot you’re not supposed to say your wish out loud…”

I stopped.

Because before I could finish the sentence, she leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to my cheek.

Fast. Soft. Warm.

My head turned back so quickly I almost gave myself whiplash.

I stared at her.

At those green eyes.

At the nervous little breath she took before she moved again. This time her lips brushed just below mine. Not quite there. Close enough to make my heart slam against my ribs.

“Em…” I said, barely above a whisper.

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Every part of me wanted to close that space. Every part of me wanted to kiss her exactly the way I’d been

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Chapter 175

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thinking about for way too long. Instead, I put my hands on her shoulders and pulled back gently.

It took more effort than I wanted to admit.

“I promise I’ll kiss you,” I said, my voice low and rough, “but I want to kiss you when you’re fully sober.”

She looked at me for a second, then gave a small nod. No fight. No teasing. Just that soft, understanding look that somehow got under my skin more than anything else.

Then she shifted closer and rested her head against my chest, the blanket wrapped around her, her body warm against mine while we both looked back up at the sky. And as we sat there together under the stars, all I could think about was time..

How much of it I’d wasted.

Years I stayed away. Years I let silence win. Years I spent without her.

What the hell had I been thinking?

I should’ve never left. I should’ve held on to her. I should’ve fought harder…for her, for us. And maybe the truth was, some part of me had always known digging into the past would lead to something ugly. Something that would hurt too much to live with.

Didn’t matter anymore.

I was done letting the truth stay buried. I was going to find out what happened to us. And whoever was responsible for tearing us apart? I’d never forgive them. Especially for what it did to Emery.

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10:40 Thu, Mar 26 M …