I Swear I Still Hate Him (Atlas Lawson) novel Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Emery’s POV

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I couldn’t help the smile tugging at my lips as my alarm blared through the room. For the first time ever, I didn’t want to throw it out the window. I rolled over, yanked off my fluffy sleep mask, and shut it off with a happy little sigh.

Weird.

I hopped out of bed and padded to the bathroom. My shower felt like heaven. I couldn’t stop humming while I washed my hair. My skin looked clear, my body felt light, and I even caught myself dancing a little as I brushed my teeth.

Breakfast was somehow amazing-even though it was just eggs and toast. Five stars. Gordon Ramsay could’ve cooked it himself, and I wouldn’t have noticed the difference.

And the air? So fresh. So clean. The sky was the brightest blue. Birds were chirping, and yeah, I may or may not have waved at one like I was some Disney princess.

I felt… good.

Like really good.

All thanks to a certain hockey captain and his stupidly talented mouth. I still couldn’t believe I’d actually had an orgasm from just my boobs. I was still floating in a post-pleasure cloud when I spotted Jazz outside the building, already waiting with a cup of iced coffee in hand. Her eyes lit up the second she saw me.

“Okay, you need to spill the tea,” she said, stepping closer with a look that screamed girl, I know something’s

My heart skipped for a second. “Tea?” I said, trying to play dumb, hoping she wasn’t about to mention Atlas.

Well… she kind of was.

Not directly.

“You’re literally glowing,” she said, narrowing her eyes.

I fought the grin that tried to take over my face. “Whhhhat? No, I’m not.”

“You so are,” she said, pointing at me like she’d cracked a case.

Before I could respond, Sam joined us, dragging her feet and looking like she wanted to sue the sun for existing. Her hoodie was pulled over her head, and her hair was a mess.

“Hey,” she mumbled, voice scratchy.

“Hey, you,” I said, smiling at her.

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Chapter 32

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She squinted at me like the light physically hurt her. “What’s up, Em-whoa. Did you do something to your skin? You’re radiating.”

“That’s what I said!” Jazz threw her hands up. “Right? It’s not just me.”

I chuckled, biting the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing too hard.

“Come on, Emmy Bear,” Jazz said, leaning in with that classic nosy bestie look. “Tell us the secret. You’re either in love, got laid, or using some expensive skincare, you’re gatekeeping.”

I let out a laugh. “Noooo,” I said, dragging the word out, even though everything in me wanted to say:

It’s Atlas. It’s his mouth. And his hands. And his voice when he-

Emery, stop.

Secret… oh, the secret had everything to do with a certain hockey captain and his God-tier lips. Seriously, if there were awards for orgasms, Atlas Lawson deserved a plate, a medal, a billboard. If his lips could do that, I couldn’t help but wonder what his dic…

I shook my head. Nope. Get your mind out of the gutter, Emery Collins.

I cleared my throat, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “Oh, the secret?” I said, pretending to think. “It’s just, uh… a good night’s sleep.”

And a lot of moaning, but sure, let’s keep that part to myself.

Sam groaned. “Well, if sleep can make me look like that, I need to try your routine. Stat.”

Jazz put a hand on her shoulder. “When are you ever going to love mornings? They’re peaceful and full of hope.”

Sam scrunched her nose. “Maybe when I die and come back as a bat.”

Jazz blinked. “Bats don’t like the sun.”

“I know.” Sam deadpanned, dragging her hoodie lower over her face like she was hiding from the light.

We headed to practice, all excited and giggling, and excited to crush the day…okay, maybe just cringy me.

***

I took a deep breath, toes curled on the edge of the plank, and raised my arms above my head. For one second, everything around me disappeared, the chatter, the splash of water, the weight of expectations.

It was just me.

I bent my knees and dove.

The moment my body hit the water, the world blurred into silence. My limbs moved on instinct, arms slicing through the surface, legs kicking in rhythm, breath held tight in my chest.

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Chapter 32

I can do this. I can do this…

Each stroke echoed the mantra in my head, and with every push, I swam harder.

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The moment I reached the end, I didn’t hesitate. I turned, kicked off the wall, and moved again.

No stopping. No thinking. Just pure motion.

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When I finally reached the finish and broke through the water, I gasped, flipping my goggles up. My chest heaved, lungs begging for air. My eyes immediately shot to Sophie.

She stood on the deck, timer in hand, her expression blank, stone cold, like always.

My stomach dropped.

Coach stood next to her, arms crossed, watching, unreadable. My wet fingers clenched the edge of the pool. I didn’t even realize I was holding my breath again until…

“1:03.47,” Sophie called out.

I blinked. “Wait… what?”

Jazz shrieked. “You did it!” She dropped to her knees by the edge of the pool, grinning wide. “That’s a whole six seconds off your last time!”

“Oh my god,” I whispered, heart thudding. “Oh my god.”

Sam whooped and reached out a hand to pull me up. “That’s what I’m talking about, Emmy bear!”

I laughed as I let them haul me out of the water, my suit dripping and my legs barely steady. Even Sophie, icy Sophie, cracked the smallest smile. Barely there… but it was real. Coach gave me a slow nod. “Better. Much better.”

It hit me all at once.

I did it.

Not perfect. Not first place. But better. I pushed my wet hair back, a wild grin spreading across my face. “Okay, okay… now I feel like I’m not totally trash.”

Jazz giggled. “Trash? Girl that was fire.”

My muscles ached, but it felt good. For once, I didn’t feel like I was drowning in doubt. I felt… lighter.

Maybe I belonged here after all.

***

“One Dr Pepper for the famous hockey captain,” I said, dropping the cold can in front of Atlas with a dramatic

thud.

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Chapter 32

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He looked up from where he was sitting under the big oak tree outside the student union, brows raised and lips twitching. “Okay… is the world ending? Or did you finally break your ‘no talking to Atlas in public’ rule?”

I shrugged, trying not to giggle like an idiot. “Guess who officially got her groove back?”

He leaned back, his face lighting up with a slow grin. “You aced practice.”

I nodded, practically bouncing. “One minute, three seconds, and forty-seven milliseconds, baby.”

Atlas reached out, and without needing to say a word, we launched into our ridiculous handshake-

Palm slap, fist bump, finger snap, elbow tap.

Yeah, we had a handshake, all thanks to my dad, who really thought a handshake would make me like Atlas Lawson. I had sworn never to do that handshake, but today was an exception.

He smirked. “Knew you had it in you.”

“It’s all thanks to you, you know,” I said softly, leaning my chin on my hand. “Mr. Orgasm Lord.”

He choked on a laugh. “Orgasm Lord? Seriously? We really need to work on your naming skills.”

“Oh, please.” I rolled my eyes. “Don’t act like your ego isn’t already taking up half the quad.”

Atlas leaned in slightly, his grin lopsided. “I’m just saying… ‘Orgasm Lord’ sounds like I wear a cape.”

We both started laughing, and then we just… kept looking at each other.

Atlas’ grin widened, that usual cocky smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, revealing his deep dimples. I matched it easily, leaning back like I had all day to sit here and bask in my glory. Okay, maybe we were sitting a bit close. But who cared? I was still on my post-practice high, and I was allowed to enjoy a little flirt and fizz. Besides, it’s not like he was complaining. He was looking at me like he was about to say something smug, probably about the way I moaned his name last night, when…

“Emmy Bear?… Cap?”

My neck nearly snapped when I turned.

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