I Swear I Still Hate Him (Atlas Lawson) novel Chapter 78

Chapter 78

Chapter 78

Emery’s POV

:

I am the worst daughter in the entire universe.

Like… call Guinness. Write my name in the freaking records.

Stamp it on a plaque.

“Emery Collins: World’s Most Pathetic Daughter.”

Just why… why did I have to be this way?

67

55 vouchers

My dad had been nothing but the best father, and he was finally, after so many years, getting married to a woman he loved. I should’ve been excited. I was happy for him, believe me, but… my heart still ached for him.

For Atlas.

I was in love with my dad’s fiancée’s son. My soon-to-be stepbrother.

You’d think saying it in my mind would make me feel like shit…well, it did…but nothing compared to the annoying ache in my chest when I thought about last night.

About her…. The beautiful girl who looked like a freaking K-pop star.

Atlas’s ex-girlfriend.

Mindy.

And yes, I was worried about that.

W

I had hoped going for a jog would clear my mind, but nope. I felt ten times worse. My head pounded from lack of sleep, and every breath made my chest tighten. I felt like shit, okay? I felt terrible. Angry. Jealous. Exhausted. And I just wanted a break from… everything.

My legs felt like they were made of jelly, so I slowed to a stop, bending forward with my hands on my knees as I tried to catch my breath. Sweat dripped down my forehead, and I wiped it with the back of my hand. Every muscle in my body ached, but somehow it still didn’t feel like enough punishment.

“I deserve worse,” I muttered under my breath, straightening up. “God, I’m such a horrible person.”

When I turned around, I froze. There she was.

Mindy.

Looking annoyingly beautiful even in the early sunlight. Her brown hair was tied back in a sleek ponytail, her skin glowing, her workout set expensive enough to pay my tuition. She looked like she belonged in a Vogue fitness campaign, while I, apparently, looked like a flustered pink flamingo.

15:19 Tue, Dec 30

Chapter 78

Of course she showed up.

Of course the universe hated me.

I plastered on the fakest smile known to humankind.

“Hi,” I breathed out.

“Oh! I wasn’t sure if it was you,” she said with her soft British accent. Because of course she had a British accent. Why wouldn’t she? Her dad was some billionaire CEO who jumped between London and the US, and she literally grew up between countries.

“Yeah,” I said, forcing my shoulders back. “You came for a morning jog?”

She nodded, brushing a strand of hair behind her car. “Yeah, my dad has a gym close by. If you ever want to use it, or need a jogging partner, I’m always around.”

I nodded, trying not to die. “Thanks.”

Can this conversation end please.

“Oh, and I just have to say, you look really pretty today. I love your pink-on-pink,” she said with a bright

smile.

I blinked.

Was she mocking me?

Or being genuinely sweet?

Honestly, if she was mocking me, she deserved an Oscar.

Because yes, I did put effort into my workout look today. Light makeup. Gloss. Concealer. Cute pink matching set. Hair in a high ponytail.

And yes, it was absolutely because I hoped Atlas might see me.

He didn’t.

He was still in his room.

Probably texting her, my brain whispered.

I hated that voice.

“Well,” Mindy said, breaking my spiraling thoughts, “I should get going, but it was really nice meeting you. I hope we can catch up sometime.”

“Yeah… me too.” I delivered the world’s fakest smile.

She waved, then jogged off effortlessly, ponytail bouncing like she was in a movie.

15:19 Tue, Dec 30

Chapter 78

667

55 vouchers

I stood there for a moment, my breath stuck in my chest, my hands on my hips as I stared at the ground.

God.

I hated this.

I hated this so much.

Hated the jealousy….Hated the guilt…Hated wanting someone I wasn’t supposed to want.

But most of all…

I hated wanting him.

I walked back toward the beach house, completely lost in my thoughts, my chest tight, my legs dragging. I was replaying Mindy’s perfect face, perfect body, perfect everything in my head… and that was already enough torture for one morning.

So of course I didn’t see the wall of muscle in front of me until I slammed right into it.

Strong hands caught my shoulders, steadying me.

I looked up.

My breath caught.

Atlas.

No. No no no. Not now.

His eyes widened the second he saw me-my messy ponytail with strands sticking out like broken antennae, sweat dripping down the sides of my face, makeup smudged under my eyes like a sad raccoon. Oh, and let’s not forget my puffy eyes from the stupid tears that had escaped earlier.

Great just great… Can the ground upon up. Hey guys I think it’s time cause what the freak…

His brows pulled together instantly. “Emery… what happened?”

The gentleness in his voice almost broke me. My throat tightened, and I swallowed hard, looking down because if I met his eyes for too long, I was going to ugly-cry in 4K.

He stepped closer, voice deeper now. “Emery, did someone do something to you?”

Yes.

You.

Your ex.

Your stupid perfect smile.

15:19 Tue, Dec 30

Chapter 78

This whole stupid situation.

But all I managed was a shaky, pathetic, embarrassing: “I’m fine.”

My voice cracked right in the middle of it, and I winced. Great. Love that for me.

65

55 vouchers

Before he could say anything else, because one more gentle word from him and I would have collapsed…I slipped out of his hold and walked past him, eyes fixed straight ahead. I felt his stare burning into my back, like he wanted to follow me, grab my arm, make me talk.

But I couldn’t. Not right now.

The second I stepped onto the deck, Ford’s voice came flying at me like a baseball.

“Woooow, Emmy bear, you’ve got some fine juicy ass!”

I stopped dead, blinking.

Sam gasped and smacked his arm. “Ford! Oh my God!”

“What?” Ford said, completely unbothered. “She does have a good bum.”

Jazz chimed in casually, “Yeah, she really does.”

A tiny, reluctant smile pulled at my lips. If I wasn’t emotionally dying inside, I probably would’ve teased them, maybe thrown a pillow at Ford, maybe done a dramatic bow.

But instead, everything inside me felt tight and hollow.

So I just kept walking.

No jokes. No sass. No comeback.

All I wanted was to crawl into my bed, bury myself under the blankets, and pretend none of this…Atlas, Mindy, my stupid heart….existed.

God, why did feelings have to be so complicated?

Oh, If only I knew the whole messed up complication was just being dug, soon to get deeper.

田

AD

Comment

Send gift

No Ads

15:19 Tue, Dec 30