Marked by the Alpha Team (Luna Merrick) novel Chapter 189

10:08 Thu, Aug 6 đa D.

Marked by the Alpha Team

Peaceful Exchange

Luna’s POV

55 vouche

I let out a long, tired sigh before finally finding the courage to respond. The entire walk from Theo’s room to Ryder’s had been spent mentally rehearsing what I wanted to say, but now that I was actually standing in front of him, every carefully prepared sentence suddenly seemed inadequate. I hated misunderstandings, especially when they involved people l couldn’t help but care about, and regardless of how complicated my relationship with all five of my mates currently was, I cared about every one of them in one way or another.

Ryder had looked genuinely hurt when he walked out of the living room earlier, and that image had stayed with me even after leaving everyone else behind. I could not simply pretend that I had not seen the disappointment on his face. Looking him steadily in the eyes, I slowly clasped my hands together to stop myself from fidgeting before finally/speaking.

“The reason I came to see you,” I said quietly, making sure my voice stayed steady, “was because I wanted to talk about what happened back in the living room. You looked really upset after everything that happened, and I didn’t want to leave this house knowing there might be a misunderstanding between us. Before I went back to my dorm, wanted us to talk things through because the last thing I wanted was for you to think I made that decision without caring about how it would affect you and the rest of the guys.”

Ryder remained completely silent after I finished speaking. He neither interrupted me nor looked away from me. Instead, he simply stood there with one hand inside the pocket of his shorts while quietly studying my face. His expression barely changed, but I could tell he was thinking carefully about what I had just said. After several long moments, he slowly shrugged his shoulders in a way that somehow looked both casual and tired at the same time. There was no bitterness in his eyes, no sarcasm in his voice, and somehow that made his response even harder for me to process because it was nothing like I had expected.

“You’ve already made up your mind,” he responded calmly after letting out a breath. “So I honestly don’t think there was any reason for you to come all the way here just to explain yourself again. The message was already perfectly clear the moment you said it downstairs.”

His answer immediately confused me because I had absolutely no idea what message he believed I had sent. The more I replayed the conversation from earlier in my head, the more convinced I became that we were thinking about two completely different things. I frowned slightly as I searched his face, hoping to find some clue that would help me understand where he was coming from. When I found none, I decided the only thing I could do was ask him directly.

“What message?” I asked with genuine confusion written all over my face. “What exactly do you think was so perfectly clear?”

The look Ryder gave me after hearing my question almost made me laugh despite how serious the situation was. He stared at me with an expression that clearly asked whether I was honestly being serious right now. His eyebrows lifted ever so slightly before he slowly shook his head. He looked like someone who wanted to answer but had already decided it would be pointless. Instead of responding immediately, he took another slow breath, almost as though he were trying to organize his thoughts before speaking.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” he responded quietly while keeping his eyes locked on mine. “I’m not about to explain something that I honestly think you already understand. Besides, if you’ve already made your decision, then I don’t think you should feel obligated to go around explaining yourself to me or anyone else.”

He paused briefly, and when he spoke again, there was an unexpected calmness in his voice that immediately caught my

attention.

“At the end of the day,” he continued calmly, “you don’t owe any of us an explanation. Just because all five of us happen to be your mates doesn’t suddenly mean we’re entitled to one. The choice you made belongs to you. Whether we like it or not doesn’t change the fact that it’s your decision to make. None of us have the right to make you feel guilty simply because your decision wasn’t exactly what we wanted to hear.”

For several long seconds, I simply stared at him without saying a single word. Out of everything 1 had mentally prepared myself to hear today, this was the last thing I was expecting to hear, and I definitely didn’t think Ryder would sound so understanding, especially with how upset he had looked earlier.

10:08 Thu, Aug 6 đêm Di

Marked by the Alpha Team

55 votones

Just a short while ago, Theo had openly admitted that he wanted me to choose him. Orion had looked seconds away from starting another fight with Jace in the living room, and I was already dreading the direction of the conversation I’d have with him. Even Knox had quietly looked irritated despite hiding it well. Yet Ryder, who had looked just as upset as everyone else when he walked out of the living room, was now calmly telling me that I had every right to make my own decision. It almost felt unreal, and because it felt, so different from everything I had expected, I could not stop myself from asking the question that had been sitting in my mind ever since he started talking.

“So… are you really telling me you’re not upset?” I asked carefully while studying his expression. “Because honestly, it’s really hard for me to believe that after seeing the look on your face downstairs.”“

A faint smile appeared on Ryder’s face, but it was the kind of smile that carried more sadness than happiness. He looked away briefly toward the other side of his room before turning back to me again. Even though he remained composed, I could tell there were still emotions he had not fully worked through yet. The difference was that he seemed determined not to let those emotions control the conversation between us.

“I’m not saying I’m not upset,” he responded honestly after another short pause. “I’m simply saying that even if I am upse that still doesn’t make me entitled to an apology from you when you haven’t actually done anything wrong.”

He rubbed the back of his neck absentmindedly before giving me a tired smile that somehow made him look softer than usual.

“And before you start thinking I’m only saying this because I want to look mature or cool,” he added sincerely, “don’t. I’m saying it because I genuinely believe it. I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t disappointed, but my disappointment doesn’t suddenly make you responsible for fixing my feelings.”

I honestly did not know how to respond.

Nothing about this conversation was unfolding the way I had imagined during the walk here. Instead of accusing me, Ryder was somehow making me feel less guilty. Instead of demanding answers, he was telling me that I did not owe him any. The more he spoke, the more I realized just how badly I had underestimated him since arriving at this school. I lowered my eyes for a brief moment before looking back at him, determined to make sure he understood why I had still chosen to come.

“I know you think I didn’t have to explain myself,” I responded softly while offering him a small smile, “but I still wanted you to hear from me because I never wanted you to think I was trying to hurt you.”

I paused briefly as I searched for the right words.

“I never wanted to hurt anyone,” I continued quietly. “Everything that’s happened since I came to Blackridge has been one disaster after another. Every day someone has something new to say about me. Every day someone assumes I’m trying to use you boys because you’re rich. Every day I feel like I’m defending myself against people who already decided who I am before even speaking to me. I agreed to this fake relationship with Jace because I realized that I couldn’t keep living like that anymore. I wanted people to stop treating me like the poor scholarship girl who was chasing after rich guys just to climb up the social ladder. That’s all I was trying to accomplish. I wasn’t trying to choose one person over everyone else.”

The room became completely silent after I finished speaking. Ryder never interrupted me once. He simply listened from beginning to end, and somehow that alone made me feel heard. After another few quiet moments passed between us, he slowly nodded his head. The nod was small, but it carried enough sincerity to make the tight feeling inside my chest case just a little.

“I completely understand,” he responded gently while looking directly into my eyes. “Honestly, I do.”

He took another slow breath before continuing.

“I can’t exactly smile about everything right now,” he admitted with a helpless little shrug. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still trying to process what happened downstairs. Seeing your mate, who you want, publicly become another guy’s girlfriend, even if it’s fake, isn’t exactly easy to swallow.”

A faint sinile slowly returned to his face. “But just because you chose Jace for this fake relationship doesn’t mean I’m giving up on my mate without putting up a proper fight,” he continued with quiet determination. “For now, though, I’m going to let

1

10:08 Thu, Aug 6 d AD

Marked by the Alpha Team

VERIFYCAPTCHA_LABELVerify