The Eclipsed Life of Luna Mischa (by Jennifer Francis) novel Chapter 60

CH 60

She posted that gift of her weekend trip to the day spa on the pack’s social media page on Saturday in her lunch break. When Anthony made mention of it as they had lunch together, she even tagged it A spa weekend for Valentine’s Day, and some lovely spa products as extra gifts thank you, Anthony‘ She’d put up the photo of the pretty box and all the gifts inside it, so everyone could see what he’d gifted her.

She’d then offered to take a selfie with him, something he’d been happy about, and she’d leaned back against him and smiled at the camera as he’d hugged her and then practically

purred in her ear, “What did you get me?”

“Not that,” she’d laughed, “Yes, we’re doing better, but I still want to wait.”

“Mm.” was all he’d said.

“What do you want other than that?” she asked, out of simple curiosity, because she’d not gotten him anything at all, and technically that day spa was all her doing he’d just called Nicholas to make sure he was seen paying for it and gifting her something. Not just for the pack to see, but likely also Nicholas himself.

Considering Nicholas‘ words to her on more than one occasion, about her and Anthony’s demise, which he saw coming and didn’t care to hide that fact at all. She wondered if he stated it and just put it out there uncaringly to try and get Anthony to realize what was going on and make him see he was in fact going to lose her as his Luna.

“I’d accept a kiss from you as my gift, and it would cost you nothing,” he stated as his eyes moved to her lips and lingered on her mouth.

She’d not stopped him from kissing her temple, holding her hand, or hugging her at times over the week that had passed by since Christy’s release, but she’d held off on all other forms of intimacy. She knew he and Christy were back to sleeping together. Christy had made sure of that, posting a picture of herself resting her head on Anthony’s bare chest, on Tuesday morning showing off that they’d spent Monday night together, and it could be seen that her shoulders were both bare, indicating she was also naked under that sheet.

She’d tagged it “Cuddles with my Mate in the morning.” Though it was only on Christy’s account, there was, she’d noted nothing about that on his official account. She also knew that bed was not the one in the Alpha Suite, because he’d sent her a picture of him in the Alpha Suite bed late on Tuesday night, with the words ‘the bed is too big, and feels empty without in it‘ and she’d seen it was still the bed they’d had when she’d lived in that suite.

She’d not responded to it, just kind of rolled her eyes and muttered into her room, ‘I’ve not

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been in there for a year, and only now, you think it’s empty.‘ He, she thought, was pointing out to her that he was sleeping alone in his suite on the nights he should be with her, but she still wasn’t allowing him to be.

Mischa sat looking at him for a long moment and then reached up and pressed her lips to his, in a soft but chaste kiss. It was all she was willing to do. A week wasn’t proof he’d changed, but that one thing showed him. She’d moved a little bit back towards him, and he smiled at her, then pulled her back into him. “When will you leave for your spa day?”

“This evening,” she told him simply.

“After dinner then, we’ll eat early, it’s a few hours‘ drive, and I’ll have an escort go with you,” he

told her.

“I know how to get there, I won’t get lost.” She shook her head.

“I’m aware, but if there is no escort, you’ll be driving alone through a heavily populated rogue area, and at night, when they mostly come out, so an escort, or I’ll drive you there myself… I could also pick you up Monday, today and Monday are our days together and a few hours alone in a car chatting just the two of us, I’d like that.”

She thought about it for a long few minutes and then stated, “You’ll have to miss a full day’s work on Monday. Best not do that on such short notice. It’s not good for business, so I guess

I’ll take the escort.”

She’d felt the sigh that came from him even though she didn’t actually hear it, he’d tried to hold it in, and it was indicative of him being unhappy. She looked at him. “How about a compromise?” She offered. He was her Mate and Laud could actually feel sadness ebbing off Shade at her choosing not to have them drive her.

“I’m listening.” He murmured.

“How about you drive me down there tonight, a few hours together in the car chatting about whatever pops into your mind. But I have an escort bring me back. That way no interference with your working hours, and you still get to spend the rest of tonight with me.”

“Dinner with me when you come back,” he stated.

She nodded, she could do that, and he smiled a little. “I thought you were avoiding me.” Anthony murmured.

“Have I avoided you at all this week?” she countered.

“No,” he shook his head.

“Then there you go. I need this to go slow and steady is all… I will grant you a redemption arc,

CH 60

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and we’ll come back together slowly, over a few months.” She told him honestly what would

happen.

“Months,” he mused, and didn’t even try to hide that he sounded unhappy.

“Yes,” Mischa nodded. “I’m willing to try and move past it, but only slowly with time will the hurt and pain I suffered lessen. I’m not so easily won over. You shouldn’t want me to be either, it would just be a lie if I just blipped over it and how I felt. Climbed into your bed and never made you work for forgiveness.

“We need to basically start all over again, create a proper solid foundation that won’t crack in the future, not just jump back into the sack for the sake of satisfying one’s sexual needs. Sex will not fix anything. It might make you feel closer to me or that you’re being a better Mate, but honestly. To me, right now, I’d just see it being something done out of obligation, from not only you to me, but me to you.” She shook her head.

He sighed heavily but then nodded his head slowly. “I can understand that, I guess, not using sex to regrow our bond, finding other ways to reconnect.”

It was something she knew he and Christy had done as well. He looked less tired with each passing day, and despite all Christy had done, he’d still gone and climbed into her bed just two days post her getting out of the cells.

She guessed for him 10 and a half weeks was a long time to not have sex. She didn’t even really have an itch to scratch and wasn’t at all concerned about them not having sex, kind of didn’t really want to if she was truly honest with herself.

Because if and when sex came to her mind, all she got was a touch of pain in her chest, and she recalled all the times he’d not only gotten up and left her directly after sex, which had caused her pain. Now that was compounded by what she recalled of how her heat had been.

How painful the unattended bouts of her heat had become was all, and where once she’d had good memories of them together, there were now just none, they’d been obliterated in her pain, heartache and betrayal of her Mate.

She’d looked into that very thing and found it was quite a common response from a she–wolf that had to suffer through a heat alone. If a Mate did that to them on purpose, for that she–wolf she tied it to their bond. Saw it as their Mate no longer wished to be in their bond, or wanted them, and that very thing caused a deep emotional rift, that could in fact never be bridged for some.

Unfortunately for her, she knew that rift was already there for her before her heat had even come. She knew because she’d not enjoyed her heat, had gone through the motions, just like regular sex had become for them, there was nothing really loving about it, or not that she’d

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felt.

Her heat had just been the thing that topped it all off and shut down her want or need for that kind of intimacy between herself and Anthony. She didn’t think he actually understood that and wondered if she should give him that research article she’d looked up and read to try and understand her own feelings and emotions, or lack there of, where he was now concerned.

She knew a bond could remain intact after this happened, but there was either little or no emotional connection for the she–wolf where sexual intimacy was concerned. She could still spend time with her Mate and have moments where she enjoyed his company and had thoughts of wanting to be together.

They just didn’t long for those nights that they would once have, where they’d spent hours touching and tasting, enjoying the pleasure that those mate bond sparks could create and having sex for endless hours. It was just kind of turned into a duty to be performed for the she–wolf, no matter how attentive the Mate was, even in that bed, the she–wolf could just kind of zone out and just go through the motions.

It could be resolved with patience, love and care, but it took months or even years to happen because when that next heat came, there was a fear that their Mate would abandon them to

it all over again; She was now one of the she–wolves, and she knew it.

She could smile and be happy, be normal in every other way she supposed, but she already knew he was going to abandon her heat for Christy’s. Her mind was set on that, so, for her, sex was simply a no. She wasn’t actually interested in having sex with her own Mate, and that was practically unheard of for their kind.

She wanted to wait, and see if he was truly remorseful… what would he do if Christy put herself into heat within a day or even hours of herself going into heat. Would she really be made to suffer it all alone all over again, or would he try and split his time between them and leave Christy to come to her?

Would she even want that? She would not want to have sex with him while he scented like Christy. It would just turn her stomach even more and she knew it. Likely just spiral her back to him, only wanting to be with Christy even if he was with her. This was her nightmare. She didn’t truly hate her Mate, but she didn’t think she truly loved him anymore either. Hate and Love were too strong a word for what she felt, but indifferent kind of just fit to her.

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