The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO) novel Chapter 33

“Might be a sexy fresh look for you, Ems. You’re cute enough to pull it off.” He smiles at me and I sigh, pulling myself back together and dry my face on my sleeve. I take the gadgets he hands me from my desk and put them in the base of the suitcase, gently wrapping them in the protective sleeves I leave in there. My mind is blocking out any thoughts about my mother lying in a hospital bed right now and I don’t even want to process this anymore.

“I can’t let you come Jake … I don’t want you to see her like she is.” I glance at him nervously. Stomach churning.

“Why, Emma? You haven’t told me what happened.” He moves behind me, taking a strand of my loose hair and tucks it behind my ear; a normal Jake gesture which serves to make me feel fully calm. Safe. His presence and touch like a balm.

“I don’t want you to know … It’s too … There are things about my life before here, that should stay in the past.” I glance back at him pleadingly seeing his frown soften into a gentle smile as he hides his disappointment well.

“Okay, Emma … I promised I wouldn’t push.” He inhales heavily, defeated in a way.

“But you better call me every night and keep me updated … If you need me, I’ll be there in a heartbeat. Can’t leave my number one girl coping alone when she’s upset.” He brushes another strand of my hair behind my ear gently, his fingers lingering, brushing softly over my cheek bone. His green eyes locked on mine steadily.

“Promise me?”

“I promise.” I nod, basking in the caress and turn away to continue packing. Poor Jefferson has been sitting down in the car for long enough already, and I have a two-hour flight to take, minimum. Then after that I must face a sight, I already know will be unbearable in so many ways.

When I’m done packing, I go into Sarah’s room to leave her a note. I don’t want to call her and say the actual words in front of Jake. Her bed is a riot of covers and clothes and I can only guess they’ve gone for a night out on the town, not that it bothers me. We lead separate lives nowadays.

I leave the note on her mirror and close the door as I exit. In a way I’m glad she’s not here; not having to explain with Jake so close by about what’s happened to my mother for the second time in my life. Not having to deal with that knowing look on her face, thinking exactly as I do.

Will she ever change?

Jake accompanies me to the airfield and deposits me on the plane personally. Hugging me goodbye, he makes me promise that I’ll call when I land in Chicago and every night that I’m gone. I am torn in two at leaving him and not wanting him to see who I used to be. I need him far away from that part of me right now, but I am distraught to walk away from him.

Reluctantly, I let him go; flanked by the onboard hostess taking my coat and bag, Jefferson depositing my suitcase on the plane himself. He waves from the tarmac and I head to my seat, shutting out every thought and emotion, holding myself in to focus on the long flight ahead and all that I’m about to encounter.

***

It’s the middle of the night by the time we land in Chicago, and the hired driver takes me to West Englewood. The streets are badly lit, but don’t conceal the grubbiness or derelict area from view. The streets, although busy with traffic, seem almost deserted. The aura of poverty and hardship reflected in the brown buildings and scruffy stores and I get that old ripple of trepidation as unease moves through me and that weight of emptiness I used to feel at being here returns with a vengeance.

I’m to meet Sophie at my old home, the apartment that my mother has lived in since the day she brought me home from the hospital. My mother is stable in St Bernard Hospital, but I won’t be able to see her until morning to assess how much damage has been done.

I’m still numb with a tinge of anger even thinking about her. I know this isn’t natural—she’s my mother. I should feel concern, devastation, worry even, but I don’t. I’m cold and empty and upset. Enraged at her, that she just keeps following the same path in life, over and over. She’s my mother, yet all she ever taught me was that the people who are supposed to be there for you, above everyone else, only have their own interests at heart.