The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO) novel Chapter 99

I sit in the ladies’ restroom on a soft plush chaise lounge in the washing area. It’s the only place I could get to quickly that was private enough to bring myself back to inner calm. My head is all over the place. This is about more than just Jake. It’s everything. I’ve been holding it all in since the morning after my mother left. Her, my lack of ability to stay in control, the aching loneliness of Jake’s absence, and now seeing him. It’s all too much.

Maybe it’s time I faced reality and looked for another job. I was stupid to think I could work here, only floors away from him. Acting like we don’t know each other anymore. I just can’t do it.

I can’t handle the thought that any time I leave this floor I might see him. There’s a chance we could run into one another anywhere in this building, and I’ve just proven I can’t deal with it.

Looking around at the contemporary furnishings I sigh. My heart rate calmer, for now, but I know I can’t keep living like this, in the hope of feeling better.

How long before I’m an emotional train wreck again because I’ve spotted him across a hall? Or in an elevator? Or even in a meeting? I need to get a grip of myself.

I need to think about this rationally, think about what’s best for me and moving on with my life.

* * *

I take the elevator down to the lower floors where there’s a huge canteen for staff to eat with a pleasant seated area that is surprisingly private. I need time to think in a calm and quiet place, take a moment to browse the classifieds again and really think this through. Think my future through and where I go from here.

I grab a chair and sit by the large glass windows, with my English tea and bagel, to spend some time pondering over my next steps now I am back to calm. I have no intention of walking away from this table until I have a plan in my head about where I go next or what I do. I know one thing for sure, I can’t work here anymore. I was an idiot to come back at all.

I skim the classifieds in the paper someone had left on the table and I circle a couple of jobs, but neither have the lure of the one I’m in now, or even compare to being the PA to New York’s richest playboy. They don’t meet the salary I’m used to having either.

God, I need to try harder.

I pull out my cell and scroll through some online job sites. There’s a position for a PA to some European businessman so I jot it down on my note pad.

Am I really doing this? Have I really decided to leave Carrero House?

“Emma?” The chirpy voice draws my attention and I glance up to see Rosalie beaming at me. My old assistant. She looks pretty today, long auburn hair loose around her shoulders and her fitted cream suit accentuates her olive skin and hazel eyes. She always was a friendly looking girl.

“Hello, Rosalie! It’s nice to see you.” I smile back, easily, folding my paper over and moving it aside, gesturing to her to sit. She smiles brightly and flops down in front of me.

“I really have missed you on the sixty-fifth, you were my ideal boss.” She grins again, her smile overtaking her face beautifully and for the first time I realize just how much I’ve missed her. I never really gave the idea much thought when we worked together but seeing her. She used to ease my stresses and organize finer details, leaving me free to be brilliant. My secret weapon. But above all, she always had a smile for me, and I knew she was my back up, someone I could always count on. With her, I never felt like I was doing it alone.

“I miss you too. I really miss your hot chocolates, a lot.” I laugh, being genuine with her, probably for the first time.

“You seem different now … I’m sorry if that’s rude.” She lowers her lashes. “It’s just, I’ve seen you at a distance a couple of times and I don’t know, it’s like there’s something different,” a hint of blush creeps up her cheek.