The Return of My First Love novel Chapter 38

Emily

As I sat across from Alessio, with his strict eyes piercing through me as they were waiting for an answer, I had decided that lying wouldn't do any good.

It would only make the situation worse and if I had to believe my instincts, he already knew about Jason. This was just a way to test me, a way to see if I would be honest with him.

"He's Naty's dad, but you already know that," I gave him an answer, still calling him out even though I didn't have the right to.

"You mean her dad who you said wasn't in her life anymore?" Alessio countered, his tone making clear that I was the one in the wrong, and he was correct.

He gave me the chance to come clean, and I didn't take it. I had a good reason though. I was already on thin ice, and back then, a simple confession would've made him snap.

"It's not like that," I mumbled, feeling surprisingly relieved now that, that was out of the way. I wanted to tell him about all the pain Jason had caused. Not just the Emilyotional abuse, but the physical as well but I couldn't bring myself to say it out loud. "You wouldn't understand," I settled for the simplest explanation.

Alessio sighed, expressing that the answer wasn't good enough. His eyes softened, "Then make me understand."

For a moment I considered it, I really did. But the thought of recounting every detail of what Jason did to me—how he yelled, beat me, locked me in for days, used to throw me on the bed with his hand around my throat and do unimaginable things.

I didn't want to relive those moments.

"He used to abuse me," I didn't want to get too specific. "And..." I trailed off, the mEmilyories too painful to continue.

Luckily Alessio didn't push me for more. "I know enough," he released a scoff, but I could tell it wasn't towards me. It was towards Jason.

"Did you knew he was in the city?"

"I had an idea. I was going to leave the city, but then I saw him the day the driver picked me up to move in. I panicked—"

"You were never going to get in that car," Alessio concluded, chuckling. "You were going to run away from both of us?"

"I was," I responded in all honesty. "I had to choose who was worse between the two of you, and I chose Jason. Can you blame me?"

I knew he couldn't.

He had threatened my life for god's sake, of course I was going to flee.

Now I know all of that was just bluff, but how could I have known?

"Do not put me on the same level as that scum," Alessio shut his eyes for a second, steam almost blowing from his nose. "Now what do you expect me to do with the information that your ex has been looking for you?"

"Just let it go, because when this deal ends—it'll only hurt me ten times more," I pleaded, fearing the consequences of his involvEmilyent. By the looks of it, he wanted to hurt him—and I couldn't let him do that.

"Are you afraid of him?"

"Y-You wouldn't understand," I stammered. "He becomes a psychopath once you provoke him. He's capable of doing anything, and I don't want him to hurt Naty—"

Alessio reached across the table, grabbing my hand. "No one will ever hurt Naty. I mean that."

For the first time in ages, a warmth I thought I'd lost forever flickered in my heart. He truly cared for my daughter, and in that instant, I realized she was safe with him. The man I had feared so much had become her protector.

We both wanted to protect the same thing.

"Just let it go," I squeezes his hand. "If you don't want to do it for me, do it for her."

With a murmur, he released my hand. "I can take care of him if you want to. I'll make it quick."

"You can't," I shook my head, far too calm considering he was plotting an actual murder. "To us he may be a monster—but in Naty's eyes he's her dad and he can do no wrong. If she would one day find out the truth, she would never forgive me."

I tried to understand what Alessio was thinking as he stared at me with those eyes, but I couldn't, and honestly, I didn't want to. There was no reason to uncover the feelings hidden in his weak gaze.

People often felt sorry for me, and I was so over it. I never sought their pity or anything else, and I wasn't about to start.

Perhaps he wasn't even feeling sorry for me.

Perhaps his concern was for my daughter, and if it was—I could understand that.

"It's all good. He left the city anyway." Alessio clicked his tongue, looking a bit repulsed.

"How do you know? What have you done?"

Fear washed over me as a flash forward popped into my head. Alessio standing up to Jason in a way that could end up pointing right back to me, was bad news. Knowing Jason, if he would ever find me again, he would give me one fist for every disrespectful word Alessio might have called him or for every punch he might have given him.

"I didn't do anything," Alessio assured me. "All I did was kept an eye on him, that's how I know he packed his bags and went back home." 

There it was again, that sympathetic look, and I wasn't liking it one bit. It made me worry about the way I had presented myself to him. He wanted answers, I couldn't give him nothing, so I gave him something—and pushed it to the point he actually thought I was pathetic.

"Don't look at me like that," I released a breath.

"I'm just looking at you."

"Yeah, like I'm this sad, pathetic, hopeless little girl."

"It's quite the opposite." Alessio managed to surprise with a reaction I did not expect. "That's the image I had of you this entire time... but now I see just how strong you really are."