Undeniable Attraction novel Chapter 36

I became speechless after that, how the hell did he find out? As if reading my mind he threw the DNA test at me.

"Kel...I..." I stuttered not knowing what to say.

"You had a child for me and you never told me about it even when she was right under my nose. " he bellowed.

" I was going to tell you today." I managed to say, I felt like I'd cry anytime soon, this wasn't how I planned this to go.

"Today? Today? After she has been with me for how many months now? After how many years you were going to tell me today?" He angrily asked. I understood how hurt and angry he was, he has the right to be anyway.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know how to tell you, surely you didn't expect me to tell you immediately we met."

"Why didn't you tell me immediately you knew Shayan, why?" He shouted

"Well I was going to tell you but then you broke up with me calling me all sorts of things. You called me a cheat, a gold digger, a slut, why should I have told you about my child when you'd have doubted it." I sounded angry now, it was opening back old wounds that haven't healed.

"You could have at least told me for God's sake Shayan." He shouted, he made it sound easy.

"And you didn't think I tried? Every time I tried talking to you you'd tell me "leave me the fvck alone", "I don't want to have anything to do with you, don't you fvcking get it?" I mimicked

"Do you know how I felt each time you told me that? You humiliated me in front of everyone, I was just another one of your conquest but I was the only one who got pregnant." I said sadly.

"You could have still told me." He shouted

"Through what means exactly? You blocked me, I couldn't call or text you even when I called through other means you'd end the call. You didn't want me anywhere near you or talking to you. I know how much I tried telling you. Heck, I even went over to your place only to see you fvcking pretty Queen bee Betty and that's when I knew I had tried enough so when you ask yourself why you weren't a part of her life know it's because you pushed me out." I angrily said I hated remembering all this.

"Maybe if you hadn't cheated on me it wouldn't have happened, we could have raised her together." He said in his defence

"I never cheated on you Adrios, why do you always think that?" I angrily asked, it was time to lay every dirty linen on the table.

"There was proof Shayan, you always being with Jason, the pictures and then that morning I caught you both."

"You mean the morning you walked in on us sleeping? Nothing happened at all Adrios, how would you even think that?" It was outrageous, Jason had always been my friend before Kel, I knew he got jealous but not to thinking and believing I'd cheat on him.

" You were always with him, you guys were pretty close and I knew he liked you too. I'm sorry, I should have confronted you."

" So that was why you broke up with me?" I could feel all my pent up anger rising. "You thought I cheated on you, you never talked to me about it, you just concluded not even trusting me, so that's why you broke up with me, that's why you humiliated me. " My voice raised with every sentence.

He didn't even trust me at all. "You didn't trust me at all Kel, you still don't," I said sadly the tears spilling.

"Shayan I..." He started apologetically.

"I always wondered why you broke up with me, what I did to deserve all that you said to me. I always thought I wasn't good enough, beautiful enough and hearing you say those things about me demoralised me Kel, I didn't have high self-esteem, you built it only to crush it and made me feel lower than I thought. I thought the sex would make you stay, I thought you loved me." I couldn't even stop the tears from pouring.

"I did Shayan." He said and I let out a sardonic laugh.

"I was so depressed Kel, I couldn't stop thinking about you, what you said, hearing that from someone you deeply loved was crushing and then there was the pregnancy. I didn't know what to do and suicide felt like the best option. Even I was disappointed in myself."

"I'm sorry Shayan, I had no idea, I shouldn't have said all that, I never meant to hurt you." He sounded so sad right now but I don't care.

"But in the end you did Kel, my heart was broken beyond repair Kel, you ruined me. Sorry, can't even begin to cut it." I said calmly, my tone showing how hurt I was.

"I'm so sorry Shayan, does Evie know?" He asked and I shook my head.

"I'm going to tell her tomorrow," I replied.

" You shouldn't have kept it from me Shayan, you of all people knew how much I wanted to be there for my child, I never wanted my child to feel unwanted and still yet this happens," he said sadly.

I felt a bit guilty then, I remembered when we were casually talking and he said when he has a child he'd devote everything to it, all his love and attention and would hate to have his child feel unwanted because that's what he feels. His father was never there for him and he wanted to be a good father to his child.

"I'm sorry but I tried," I said and he sighed.

"Don't you feel bad for Evie not growing up with her dad? "

"Of course I did but it's not as if I could do anything about it."

"I'm so sorry Shayan, truly I am," he said taking my hands which I pulled away.

I thought I had forgiven him but after recalling all the past events I know I still hold a lot of things against him. I just wanted to go to my room and cry myself to sleep.

"Shayan..." He started and I cut him off.

"It's enough Kel. You already know Evie is your daughter. Goodnight." I said heading for the stairs. I felt like I'd crack if he said anything more.

"I know I should have been there for you..."