As the days continue to pass by, I'm still lost in this world. I lie in this hospital bed, I don't talk, I don't move. I don't want anything to do with anyone. As the doctor and nurses speak, I do not listen. I'm not interested in what they are saying. I do not care about my healing. I will heal repeatedly if I choose to or not. I heard one of them say that Ivan is coming to take me back to his house. I'm scared I don't want to stay with him. I cringe at the thought of staying with him.
As I stare outside, wishing I could fly like the birds. I haven't even really stood up from this bed. I hate that I feel so sorry for myself. I need to take control of my life. So, I decided since I am alone, I'm going to try to get up and take a shower. As I unplug the bed alarm, so they cannot hear me stand up. I have no trouble as I make it to the bathroom. Surprised that my legs aren't shaking, but strong.
I shut the bathroom door and I lock it so no one can come in. I don't want to be bothered, I just want to be alone. As I turn the water on, I watch as the steam fills around me. I take off my hospital gown and step into the hot water. I let it pour over my broken body that doesn't even have a bruise.
I hear a knock at the door, but I pay it no mind. I can hear them shouting my name, but the water feels too good. I just ignore them, not caring who it is. It's been a little while since I've taken a shower. I don't want it to end. As I hear the door open, I am surprised it took them this long to get the key. I know that it's no one other than Ivan. He would never allow anyone else to come in knowing I was undressed.
I get nervous as I hear the door then shut. As the shower curtain opens, I have no other choice but to face what is coming. That's when I see Sam. I am so excited to see him; I wrap my arms around him. Getting him all wet, but he doesn't mind as he wraps his arms around me and hugs me back.
He looks at me and says, “Lilly, I can't stay long, but I wanted to let you know I'm here. I will get you out of here, I promise you. I'm so sorry for what Ivan has done to you.”
“Sam, how am I ever going to survive all that he has done to me, it's hard enough for me to even want to wake up.”
“Lilly, just please hang in there I will get you out of here just give me time, but I have to go, I'll see you soon.”
As I watch him walk out the door, I feel sad not being able to go with him now and escape. I get back to my shower as there is no shampoo or soap. Damn it, I can't wash myself so instead. I just enjoy the water. I hear the door open again. Hoping it's Sam, and he forgot something, but when the shower curtain swings open I see Ivan, I go to cover myself.
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