“Are you okay?”
She promptly nods, “I’m fine.”
“You’re crying,” I point out. “Do you need someone to talk to?”
“No, I’m just looking back.” She sighs, motioning to the pictures on her bed. Sonograms. Shit. It breaks my heart that she still refuses to get help, but she’s always mourning her baby. “It’s nothing, sit,” she shifts, patting the mattress. “What’s going on?”
“Are you sure you’re okay?” I frown.
She nods. “Don’t worry, it's not about them.” She says with a nervous laugh. “That’s surprisingly normal.”
“Normal?” I frown. “No. Nothing is normal about what Rowan and Noah are doing. I know it's hard to talk to me because Noah is my best friend, but this is very strange, and I don't expect you to be okay with it.”
“No, I am.” She meets my gaze, her eyes red from crying. “I was simply crying over what could have been, and not Rowan being with Noah. Really, I’ve had enough time with the situation, and while I was mad at first..” she sighs. “It’s just not worth it.”
“You’re fine with them hooking up?” I repeat, my tone doing nothing to hide my surprise.
“Oh, no,” she laughs. “If this were just a hookup, I would have snapped a long time ago, but I can’t really go against fate, can I?”
“Fate?” I frown.
“Yeah, we tried it.” She nods, “He came to me the moment he first saw her, the moment he started feeling something for her, but he kept his distance for me.” She says with a weak smile. “He was on his best behaviour, but I guess his restraint snapped when I pushed him away. He was desperate for a bond, and she was the closest to what we have.”
Messy. “How do you really feel about it?” I ask, curious and channelling my inner Eleanor.
“Honestly? I don’t know Luna Aeliana.” She sighs. “I understand it, and I’m pushing myself to be better, and mature about it, but it’s so weird you know?”
I nod.
“It’s quite hard sharing him, more so when I see how happy she makes him.” She swallows, her hold on the wine bottle tightening. “He keeps saying he doesn’t love her more than he loves me, and I want to believe that, but over the last couple of days, he’s been with her more. He spent the night with me, but he was restless because she was restless, and that made me restless too, the bond is cruel sometimes.” She says, her words accompanied by a bitter laugh.


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