Chapter 308 Hold Her Hand
“Would you care if I really did hurt my body?” Sebastian murmured.
Riley looked up and met Sebastian’s gaze. “I would care. Even though we broke up, I still want you to take care of yourself.”
She sighed and set the pill bottle down on the bedside table.
“Sebastian, when I found out you’d hidden that video of Samuel from me, yeah, I resented you. I kept thinking why didn’t you tell me sooner that you’d met my brother? Why did you hide it from me? I even resented you for not saving him back then.” She paused. “But you’ve also helped me so much.
“This whole trip to Germany, you’ve helped me over and over. I remember all of it.
“So I don’t resent you anymore, and I don’t hate you. I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me. And of course I want you healthy and safe.”
After Riley finished talking, she grabbed her clean clothes and headed into the bathroom.
Sebastian walked over to the bedside table and stared down at the pill bottle. She’d just told him she didn’t resent him, didn’t hate him… but did that mean she didn’t love him any pre 14:54
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side.
That was the only way he’d truly be okay.
“Riley, if you’d just stay with me, I wouldn’t need these pills anymore,” Sebastian whispered. He lifted his left hand and kissed the black leather cuff he wore.
It was the gift she’d given him.
He’d worn it constantly. Every time he couldn’t sleep, he’d kiss the black leather cuff and pretend he was kissing her instead.
It was the only thing that gave him any relief from the restless agony of insomnia.
When Riley came out of the bathroom, she found Sebastian staring blankly at the cuff on his left wrist.
The one she’d picked out for him.
Something she couldn’t quite name twisted in her chest. She’d never imagined that the birthday present she chose for him would end up being a breakup gift instead.
Sebastian must have heard her footsteps, because he slowly looked up at her. “Ready for bed?”
“Yeah, let’s sleep.” She hesitated. “What do you need to fall 2/5
ásleep? Should we hold hands?”
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“Yeah,” he said. “Let’s just hold hands.”
“Okay.” Riley pulled back the covers and climbed into bed first.
Sebastian looked at her for a long moment, then lay down beside her. His hand slowly reached for hers and held it.
This time she didn’t pull away like before.
A small smile tugged at his lips as he heard her soft voice say, “Go to sleep.”
Sebastian closed his eyes. The warmth of her hand in his made him feel safe in a way nothing else could. This was it. She was the only one who could help him actually sleep.
Time passed quietly. Riley waited until she was sure he’d fallen asleep, then carefully opened her eyes.
She sat up and looked down at Sebastian sleeping beside her.
She hadn’t realized things had gotten this bad for him, that after their breakup, his insomnia had gotten so severe he needed medication just to sleep.
Did holding her hand really help him fall asleep?
But this couldn’t be a permanent solution. She could do this for one night, maybe two, but she couldn’t keep doing this forever. 3/5
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actually treat his insomnia properly.
Riley slowly pulled her hand free from Sebastian’s, then grabbed her pillow and blanket and went to the couch.
Sleeping in the same bed all night wasn’t right for where they
were now.
She was just grateful for his help earlier, so she’d let him hold her hand until he fell asleep. That was it.
So why did her chest ache like this? Like her heart ached for
him?
“Don’t feel bad for him,” Riley whispered to herself. Because once she started feeling bad for him, this whole mess would just get more complicated.
But can we really be together again?
Even if he promised no more lies or secrets, wouldn’t she spend the rest of her life second–guessing everything he said? Wondering what was true and what wasn’t? She’d turn into someone she didn’t recognize, paranoid and suspicious.
That wasn’t the future she wanted.
Riley closed her eyes and finally fell asleep for real.
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But after she drifted off, a figure climbed out of the bed and
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Sebastian stood there looking down at her sleeping, and something bitter spread through his chest.
Even for the sake of repaying him, she couldn’t stand to sleep beside him until morning?
She had to draw a line between them like this? Didn’t she realize that line didn’t exist anymore, not really? No matter how many times she tried to draw it, he’d just keep crossing it.
“Riley, what do I have to do for you to give me another chance?” His rough voice drifted into the silence. He crouched down slowly, resting his head against the edge of the couch. His hand moved carefully to touch hers, but he didn’t dare do anything else—he didn’t want to wake her.
When Riley opened her eyes the next morning, the first thing she saw was Sebastian’s handsome face. His hair was messy, falling across his forehead, and his eyes were closed. His long lashes stood out clearly up close.
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Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.

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