I Swear I Still Hate Him (Atlas Lawson) novel Chapter 122

Chapter 122

Daisy’s POV

FLASHBACK-WEDDING NIGHT.

“I’m sorry.”

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Atlas’s voice was barely a whisper, his head bowed low, knees digging into the rug like he was trying to ground himself, like maybe if he got low enough, it would fix all this.

I swallowed hard. “Atlas, it’s fine… You don’t have to keep apologizing. It’s been solved. Rory already took care of it…the paparazzi pulled the video. Everything’s going back to normal, we can just live like…”

“I love her.”

I froze.

“W…what?”

He lifted his head, and the moment our eyes met, my breath caught. His eyes were red and shining, full of a kind of pain I hadn’t seen in years. Not since…

“I love her, Mom.”

No. No, no, no.

“This… this is all my fault,” I whispered, stumbling back like his words had physically shoved me. “I should’ve never suggested you two live together. God, what was I thinking?”

I dropped to my knees, grabbing his hands in mine, desperate to bring him back to earth. “Sweetheart, this happens, okay? When a boy and a girl live together, things get blurry. It’s infatuation. Lust. You’re both young and emotions could be heightened, but…”

“Mom…I loved her way before we moved in together. Since the first time I saw her. There was just… something about her. Something I couldn’t shake, like she was already part of me or something.”.

No…Please No. Not this.

“You can’t love her, Atlas. For God’s sake…she’s your sister!”

The words exploded out of me, hot and sharp. My heart was racing. I shot up, pacing, my hands running through my hair as I tried to breathe. Think. Fix this.

Deep breath, Daisy. Come on. Deep. Breath.

But he didn’t flinch. He didn’t yell. He just had to be the calm son I loved so much. He walked toward me, slow and steady, until he was standing right in front of me. And then, he took my hands. Gently and smile… how dare he smile when he had put me in this uncomfortable situation.

14:33 Tue, Feb 3

Chapter 122

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“Please, Mom. Give us your blessing.”

Blessing?

The word rang in my head like a cruel joke.

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“What, so you two just run off into the sunset? Forget school? Your career? Your future? You’re young, Atlas. You have so much ahead of you….there’s going to be someone else. Someone who you would actually love, and when you look back at all of this, you’d be grateful it never happened.”

“Mom, please…”

“No!” I shouted, yanking my hands back. I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. I needed to get through to him. I needed to stop this now!

My eyes darted around the room, desperate for something… anything… to snap him out of this. And then I saw it.

The knife.

I moved before I could talk myself out of it. My hand gripped the handle like instinct, cold and shaking.

“Mom! What are you doing?!”

I pressed the blade to my neck. Just enough for him to see I wasn’t bluffing.

Atlas’s eyes blew wide open. “No…no, stop. Please stop.”

“If you leave with her,” I said, voice cracking, “I’ll kill myself.”

“Mom, don’t….please don’t be like this.”

“You are all I have, Atlas.” I could feel the tears breaking loose, hot on my cheeks. “After everything with your father, after every nightmare, the pain….. You kept me going. You saved me. I can’t lose you. If I do…” My voice broke, the knife trembling in my hand. “I’ll end it. Being with Rory is nothing compared to losing my son.”

My grip tightened. The blade pressed in. I felt the sharp sting, but I didn’t let go.

“Okay, okay! I won’t go!” Atlas shouted, hands raised in panic. “Please, Mom. Stop! Please just stop.”

“Promise me.”

I needed to hear it. Had to.

His eyes squeezed shut like the words hurt to say. “I… I promise. I won’t leave with Emery. I’ll let go of my feelings. Please don’t hurt yourself.”

My fingers let go. The knife clattered to the floor. And then he caught me. His arms were around me in an instant, tight, trembling. He held me like a child again, like a scared little boy who’d just seen the worst part of

his mother.

14:33 Tue, Feb 3

Chapter 122

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I clung to him, burying my face in his shoulder, my heart racing, my breathing ragged.

Selfish? Maybe.

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But there was no way I was losing my son. Not to this. Not to some fleeting obsession disguised as love.

PRESENT

“Do you remember the promise you made to me on the night of my wedding?” I asked, hoping the memory of that night would bring him back and make sure he doesn’t let his reckless feelings in.

“Yeah.”

I smiled and reached out, gently cupping his cheeks like I used to when he was a boy who needed comfort. My thumb brushed against the side of his face, and I tried to soak in the moment, just in case it was the last time he’d ever let me.

“I love you so much, you know that, right?”

He smiled faintly. “Of course, Mom…I love you too.”

I pulled him in for a tight, warm, and desperate hug. When he pulled away, I kissed his cheek like everything was fine.

“Now enjoy your co…”

Riiing.

My phone lit up on the table, stopping me on track. I glanced at the screen, and my heart almost dropped.

Shit.

Before Atlas could even blink, I snatched it up and ended the call with one swipe, locking the phone so fast it might’ve looked suspicious.

“Mom… are you okay?” he asked, his eyes narrowing slightly, sensing the tension.

I forced a smile, tight, too practiced. “Yeah… It’s just another spam call. I’ve been getting a ton of those lately. I should find a way to resolve that…well, enjoy your cocoa.”

Once the door was shut, my smile fell. My jaw clenched. My chest tightened. I glanced over my shoulder, making sure the hallway was empty, then made a sharp turn into the guest room and closed the door behind

I pulled out my phone and redialed the number. The line clicked almost instantly.

“You’ve lost your damn mind,” I snapped, voice low and sharp. “Why the hell would you call me?”

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