The Stand In Wife's Revenge novel Chapter 36

Chapter 36

I moved slowly deliberately and unsteadily down the dark hallway. My

body was still burning from Avas ghost touch and my mind was still

spinning. How in the hell had I become affected? I was out of control.

Totally. I was always in charge of my behavior feelings and impulses. I

had yelled however as soon as I saw her standing there staring at me

with those wide unsure eyes.

I felt like something had broken inside of me when she gas

and

her lips opened just a little in shock. I then gave her a kiss. It wasnt

just a kiss. I gobbled her up. I got to my door and combed my hair in

frustration. Before pushing the door open and slamming it behind me

my fingers balled into a fist.

Though the sound reverberated throughout the room it was

insufficient to block out my thoughts. With a groan I leaned against

the door and closed my eyes. I had to stop thinking about her. I had to

force myself to ignore the memories of how she tasted how her breath

caught when I pressed harder on her lips and how she felt in my arms.

Damn it.

Ava tasted like Fiona. A stab of pain went through my chest at the

realization. With a war raging inside of me my heart tightened. Her

voice face and mannerisms werent the only things that caught her

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attention.

The way she fit against me the way she smelled and the way my lips

automatically went for hers were all examples of how my body

responded to her. It was too haunting too familiar. Just too risky. I

pushed away from the door forcing myself to move.

As I approached the bed my hands shook a little as I reached for my

shirts buttons and undid each one individually. But my thoughts

would not leave her no matter how much I moved.

The sight of her the feel of her the way she gasped when my hands

roamed her body-. With a curse I muttered. My thoughts had

previously been occupied by her. She had been nude before. She was

soaked from the shower that night when I discovered her defenseless

and exposed.

With eyes that lingered longer than necessary I had ripped her from

her damp skin. I had assured myself that it didnt matter that I was

only assisting her and that I had no romantic feelings for her.

I had however been deceiving myself. And after tonight it was

undeniable. Her was what I wanted. I rubbed my face with

my

hands

and moaned. A desire for her was one thing. I was male. A kiss and a

moment of weakness were both reasonable.

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But it was more than just desire. There was more to it. Something

hazardous. As I tried to make sense of it I sat on the edge of the bed

with my hands on my thighs. I couldnt push her away no matter how

hard I tried the thought of her consumed and haunted me.

I didn’t just want her. I was beginning to feel something for her. I

didn’t just want her. I desired her. Not just her body but everything-

her presence her voice the way her lips parted slightly when she was

lost in thought.

Her inquisitive gaze seemed to be trying to grasp something that was

just out of her grasp as she gazed at me. Although she exuded

vulnerability she also possessed strength something that was

unbreakable at its core. And I was most uneasy about that

combination.

Desire I knew before. I had desired women given in to lust and

thoughtlessly savored brief moments of pleasure. But this was not

like the others. There was more to this than lust. And it was risky.

Ava wasnt just any woman after all. In my house she was a stranger a

woman who had lost everything including her identity and memories.

And it was my responsibility to lead her and assist her in regaining

her footing. I was losing myself in her instead. Because I wasnt

thinking of Fiona when I kissed her. She was Ava. I could tell by the

way her breath caught when I drew her in.

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For a brief intoxicating moment she melted into me. The way her

fingers gripped my shirt before she paused and then withdrew. Her

taste had been one of familiarity and warmth but completely

different. And I was horrified by that. I tightened my jaw and shook

my head as though I could shake the thoughts out of me. This isnt

feasible.

I had to put an end to this before it got worse whatever it was. Prior

to doing something I couldnt undo. I was the last person who should

be exploiting her vulnerability. That being said despite my “orts to

use reason the truth was indisputable.

Ava wasnt merely a diversion. Her obsession was growing. Fiona left a

void that no one could ever fill I had told myself. No woman could

ever touch me the way she did I had vowed. But Ava. Ava didnt fit in.

And that kiss-.

I was doomed after that fucking kiss. I let out a harsh exhale and ran

a hand through my hair once more. Now what was I meant to do? I

should not have wanted her. I did however. She looked at me as I drew

away and I remembered that. Her lips slightly parted her eyes

remained warm and her fingers trembled just a little before she

turned away.

Something had struck her as well. Of all the parts that was the most

hazardous. I let out a long breath and closed my eyes. This was the

closest thing I had allowed myself to feel in years. With Fiona I had

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buried those feelings.

I had made a commitment to never fall in love again and to never let anyone put me in danger. Awa had managed to get past my well- constructed barriers though. I recalled how she had stood in my arms her breath hot against my lips her fingers curling against my chest.

I wished to return. She was warm and I wanted to lose myself in her warmth taste her again and feel her body against mine. I stood up suddenly paced the room and cursed.

This was risky. This was reckless.

Nevertheless I never felt more alive. Ava was not Fiona. But she

was reviving my emotions. And that terrified me.