When We Were Mates (Demetra and Emris) novel Chapter 43

Chapter 43

Demetra.

“Emris. Emris, let go of me–”

“You were crying!”

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“And since when do you care!? I’ve wept in front of you more times than I have alone in my entire life. I wept during our love making…thinking, ‘Is this the day he finally tells someone I exist? Is this the day I stop being a shameful little secret he hides like a dirty magazine?“”

I scoff.

“I cried a thousand times which means you had a thousand chances…so you don’t get to care now.”

“What must I do?” He inches closer and something shifts in his voice…teeth clenching, hand on my waist tightening. I pretend not to feel it but it’s burning a hole through my skin, through my ribs, through my heart.

“What must I do to pay for everything I did to you? Tell me. Tell me-”

“Your time has passed. There’s nothing you can do.”

“Demetra.”

I need to end this before someone sees us. If a guest finds us here…a gossiping Luna, any one of these people…it’s over.

So therefore, I’m shaking. But why… why is Emris looking at me so seriously?

I feel something slide down my face and remember I’m still crying. So much. I put both hands up and rush them down my cheeks, trying to scrub away the evidence, but he sets his hands on my shoulders and something I can’t control takes over. My body starts shuddering because I’ve didn’t let it all out before he came in. And now, on top of everything, I have to look at the man who made my life this way.

I have to watch him be a good father to his son and then one day lie to my daughter that her father is dead?

Emris puts his hand on my shaking cheek. “I know what it feels like.”

I slap it off!

“How… how do you know what anything feels like? Do not compare us.” My voice is steel wrapped in tears.

“Because I don’t have a father either! And you’re terrified because your whole life, they drowned you in the rot of your mom. You were still in diapers and they were already carving ‘monster into your memory of her face.”

My eyes widen. We never speak about my mother. Derisha made sure everyone knew who she was a pack whore but I always wondered why they still kept me in the pack house.

It sounds like Emris knows why.

“So how could you still do that to me, Emris?” My voice breaks.” had no one. And still, you called me a whore. So I became one!” I hit him in the chest, trying to make him let go. I don’t want his touches. I don’t want his calm voice. I don’t want to start seeing a different part of him. I need to remember him as the cold, brutal Alpha that he is.

“Is that all? One hit?” His eyes burn fever–bright.

“Stay back. Emris, I’m warning you.”

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15:54 Mon, May 11

Chapter 43

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“What are you so afraid of? Hit me. Hit me ten times harder! Crack my ribs. Split my lip. Make me bleed until I’m kneeling in it.” He grabs my fingers and crushes against his jaw. “I’ll arrange for barghests again….I’ll let them tear into me just so you can use my trauma like a weapon. Go on. Gut me open. Watch everything ugly inside me spill out at your feet.”

I yank my hand and continue moving backward away from him I decided long ago that the only revenge he deserves is never having a life with me and his daughter.

“Fucking do something. Come here and claw the fuck out of me Demetra!”

I push at his chest and I feel is desire when he touches me. All I want to do is hug him, not hurt him.

I shove him hard! He stumbles back half a step and comes right back. I twist but he’s iron and I’m just flesh. He pulls me close and I hit his chest…really hit him but Emris takes it.

“Emris, please…” The words turn to air the moment I feel his breath on my neck.

My dumb breasts press against his hard chest. His hands find my waist and his hot mouth clamps on mine.

“Em-”

This beast kisses my mouth like a pirate. Like a thief. One hand holds the back of my head, fingers tangled in my hair, and he dips me like we’re in some kind of bridal dance while I’m caught in his arms. His teeth find my lip, biting gently, then swallowing my mouth whole until I forget how to think.

I forget my name.

I just kiss him back.

Emris pulls back to let me breath, watching my eyes flutter closed, watching my body go pliant in his hands. Why can’t I say no to him? Why can’t I push him away?

My fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt. His hand goes lower…grabbing my thigh, lifting it and wrapping it around his hip.

He turns me until my face is on the tree. His body cages mine and I hear his zipper go down. One hand raises

my dress to push my underwear for access, the other finds my breast roughly My head falls back against him and I bite my lips, waiting for the feeling of penetration where I’m already needy.

“What the hell!”

I freeze. That wasn’t me. That wasn’t Emris. I force my eyes open and the world comes crashing back!

Eden. And Teddy. Standing at the edge of the clearing, faces caught between shock and horror.

“Shit!” Teddy repeats, like his brain can’t process anything else.

I wipe my mouth and see my lipstick smeared across Emris’s lips pink and obvious and damning. I reach for his face, scrubbing at the evidence like that will undo the last thirty seconds.

“Both of you are….”

“Mistake!” I yell.

“It’s not a mistake.” Emris says it calmly.

I whip toward him.

“Wait.” Eden runs a hand through his hair and he begins to pace around while I’m shaking. Actually shaking, my entire body vibrating with panic.

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15:54 Mon, May 11

Chapter 43

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What explanation do I have? What can I possibly tell my cousin after he just found me kissing the man my whole family knows I hate? There’s nothing.

“Kissing… moons, are you two…together!?” Teddy’s voice pitches up.

“We’re not together! He…he kissed me!” I point at Emris, shoving the blame onto him and he chuckles like this is funny, like his sister just discovering he’s a cheater is some kind of joke.

“Yes, I kissed her.” He touches his lips. “But the first time? She kissed me.”

“Emris!” I yell.

“How is that possible? You guys hate each other! You’re practically angel and devil-”

“I hate him.” I cut Teddy off. “I still hate him. That kiss meant nothing. I swear to you guys. What you saw…I swear, it meant nothing. He’s the one who kissed me.” I scramble away from Emris, putting distance between us, and grab Eden’s arm. “Is anyone else here? Did anyone follow you? Please tell me no one else saw-”

“Demetra…” Eden looks at me with this grave expression, this disappointment that I absolutely deserve. I’ve hit rock bottom because of Emris. Again. And now my own family has witnessed it.

“I’m…” My eyes water. “Eden, I’m sorry.”

“No. You said he kissed you.” Eden’s jaw tightens. “It’s this bastard who should be apologizing. He hates our pack. He tried to get me and Teddy to end our bond. Now I see why he can’t end his own.” His eyes narrow at Emris. “Because he wants you back.”

“Correct.” Emris doesn’t even hesitate.

“Fucking bastard.”

I just stand there wishing the ground would open and swallow me whole.

“Be careful now.” Emris warns him.

“I should be careful?” Eden starts walking toward Emris and I don’t even want to get near them. I’m too scared to be close to Emris again. Teddy steps between them because I’m just… I just can’t.

“Come closer. Let me show you how careful I can be, little boy!”

“Emris, can you stop!?” Teddy yells.

Emris looks at her. Then his gaze shifts to me.

His face changes and his smirk vanishes, replaced by something harder to read.

“I’ll be at the parents‘ section. When the birthday party is over, we’ll leave.”

He starts walking. Toward me.

I press myself against the nearest tree, giving him as much space as the already wide woods allow…

Teddy follows him out, throwing one last confused glance over her shoulder before they disappear through the trees.

I wait for Eden to turn around. I’m hyperventilating. I need to paint him a picture that this isn’t what he thinks. I’m not in love with Emris. I just… I need him to forget everything he just heard. Everything Emris said. The way he turned and looked

at me made me want to-

“Kissing him?”

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15:54 Mon, May 11.

Chapter 43

“Eden-”

“Have you forgotten what he did to you? What he did to Amira?”

I press my finger to my lips, glancing at the trees. They could have ears. Anyone could be listening.

“It’s the mate bond. I-”

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“He said it’s happened before.” Eden’s eyes bore into me. “What happened between you two? You know he’s vile, right? If you’ve forgotten who Alpha Emris is, let me remind you. He’s the one who uses people into nothing. Who uses packs, who used his own mate and kept her secret. Who replaced her like she was nothing. Who’s bullied packs so badly some of them don’t even exist anymore-”

“Eden. Please keep this to yourself.”

I don’t even care to defend myself anymore. I just need him to never speak of this to anyone. I can’t have this getting out. Can’t have my family knowing I’m still this weak, still this broken over a man who destroyed me during and after post- partum.

“Just pretend you didn’t see us. I don’t know how else to explain it to you. You can be ashamed of me right now…I get it. But there’s nothing you’re feeling that I’m not already feeling a hundred times worse.” Tears burn my eyes. “I ask myself these questions every single day. And yet he kisses me and I lose my mind. Every. Time.” I press my hand to my chest, then to my forehead.

“What do you want me to do, Eden? He hasn’t rejected me…‘

Eden is quiet for a long moment.

“I didn’t see you.”

I lift my eyes to his.

“I didn’t see any of this.” He repeats and walks away.

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