I couldn’t help shaking my hand with the hair dryer. In order not to look flustered, I looked away and continued to dry my hair.
After a while, I felt his hand around my waist.
My body quivered.
I didn’t move and just sat there and continued to dry my hair.
His kiss fell on my wet hair, neck and shoulders.
Maybe because I was too nervous, I forgot to move my hand holding the hair dryer. I didn’t realize it until the hot air hit my scalp.
I quickly turned off the hair dryer.
Without the sound of the hairdryer, the whole room suddenly became quiet.
Without the interference of the hairdryer, Ming leaned closer to me and put his arm around my waist.
I sat there with my back stiff and I didn’t dare to move.
After a while, Ming’s hands finally began to unbutton my pajamas and his kiss became more and more passionate.
I turned my back to him and closed my eyes and seemed to be waiting.
One.
Two.
When he took off my pajamas, he found that there was still a dress in it.
I suddenly heard him chuckle, “are you afraid of me?”
“I... I’m cold.” I bit my teeth.
I didn’t believe this lie.
“Oh.” Ming listened and asked tentatively, “are you going to take it off now?”
“...”
I sat there, struggling.
I didn’t want to.
I didn’t know if other people were like me. I didn’t want to have sex with people I didn’t love.
I didn’t feel anything.
At this moment, his kiss only made me feel terrible and disgusted.
Nothing else.
Even though I didn’t speak, Ming started his own action. I just felt cold in the abdomen.
My clothes had been lifted.
I closed my eyes and did not move and waited for his next move.
But after a while, the cold in my abdomen did not spread.
Instead, my clothes were put down.
I opened my eyes and saw through the mirror that Ming had no action. He just sat behind me with his hands around me and smiled helplessly, “you look like you are going to the execution court, which makes me really can’t bear to force you.”
“I’m sorry...”
I looked down and apologized.
I was afraid that he would be angry and disappointed.
I wanted to live. I hoped Sean had a good life. I wanted to protect Lester.
“It’s OK.” Ming lifted the quilt. “Let’s sleep. Can I sleep with you in my arms?”
His voice was gentle. He could force me but he asked for my opinion.
It was like nothing had changed.
I nodded. “I dry my hair.”
With that, I picked up the hair dryer again. As soon as I opened it, Ming took the hair dryer from my hand and said, “I’ll help you.”
I was surprised.
Ming just held the hair dryer and helped me dry my hair slowly.
His movements were gentle.
I remembered that he had washed my hair.
If I didn’t know those things and nothing happened today, maybe I would accept him.
It was a pity.
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