The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO) novel Chapter 210

“I still love you, Jake, but I’m so confused right now and so hurt. I was always yours. I don’t know how else I could’ve made you believe it. What else I could have said or done?” I’ve no idea what else to say after that. So many things are running through my head, trying to process that Jake could be as insecure as me in our relationship has completely thrown me, I never imagined someone like him would doubt anything; let alone how I felt about him.

“You didn’t need to, baby. I should’ve realized it before acting like the world’s biggest asshole. I love you more than anything in the world, you have to believe that.” He catches my other wrist and pulls both hands up, so I’m drawn toward him, his forehead touching mine, giving me no option but to obey.

His alluring green eyes meet mine, but they are dark and foreboding with the intensity of his emotions. Emotions matching mine.

I missed those eyes so much, like doorways to my soul.

“You’re mine, you’ll always be mine, and I’ll literally rip the world apart to keep you, bambino.” He leans in and I know he’s going to kiss me, moving in slowly, his eyes focused on my mouth with a hint of longing so intense it stings through my chest. My heartbeat rises in tempo and my blood runs cold as fear overtakes me. My breathing hitches as he gently grazes his lips across mine, soft, warm, and tender. Familiar lips that I could almost fall into, hoping to erase the pain they caused.

Marissa floods into my head smirking at me, pulling Jake’s mouth to hers while her eyes bore into the recesses of my mind, forcing me to push him away sharply.

“I can’t … Not yet.” I gasp yanking back trying to reel in the crazy burst of emotions that are overwhelming me, suffocating me, and making my body tingle crazily. He lets me loose with a sigh and a look on his beautiful face of utter deflation.

“I understand. I told you, whatever you need, no matter how long it takes. I’m going to do whatever it takes to have you back with me.” The sincerity in his voice helps calm me.

“I can’t think straight … I’m so tired and overemotional.” I sag against the couch, letting out a slow breath, wiping more tears from my already sensitive face. The hangover hits me hard again and fatigue pushes at my eyelids cruelly. I long for some peace in this nightmare for just a little while, all this emotional roller coaster has done is make me crave for sleep.

He leans out pulling me into his arms, strong, safe, and secure. He slides back along the couch and nestles me alongside him as he lies down, his arms and legs around me, spooning me. I don’t fight or struggle. I’m too tired to protest or resist, a part of me wants this, after everything that he’s told me, a part of me needs to feel him around me right now. The pain of being close and not have him touch me has been agony.

“Go to sleep, neonata. I’m not going anywhere; I could use the sleep too. I was up all night checking on drunk women.” He buries his face in the back of my hair and breathes me in, surrounding me with the security that I’ve been aching for. My mind is telling me to push him away, but my heart is aching with his touch. I close my eyes, trying to bring calm to my reeling mind, trying to ignore the way my body is relaxing into him, molding itself to his hold like a traitorous whore.

You’re weak, just like her! Your mother would be so proud!

I push the voice in my head away, too tired for battle, too tired for any of this. I know I shouldn’t let him touch me, but I can’t compete against this. I’m tired, broken, and hungover and right now, lying here in his arms is a battle I’m too exhausted to fight against.

“Maybe for a little while,” I say. “Then I should go.” I’m already relaxing into him, tiredness fuzzing out my brain, like being enveloped into a soft, fluffy, warm room after a terrifyingly cold night. It’s so easy to relax in his arms, they’ve always been my safety net and my whole world. The fatigue is moving in with just his hold over me as though I’ve been waiting to come back to this.

Lying here like this I finally feel able to still my mind, focusing on just the feel and smell of him. The gentleness of his breathing and the way his fingers stroke my arm. It’s all so familiar and so necessary to my mental state. I don’t fight sleep as it moves in, enveloped in his arms, in the warmth and security my body has been longing for.

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