Touching the Heart of Ace novel Chapter 57

I placed a cute butterfly hair band on Lia??s head.

??So pretty...?? I kissed her forehead and she frowned.

??Weally, Davey???

??Really really.??

She was so insecure about her almost naked head now. We had to cut it so short but it helped her with the sweating. Her fever was manageable and as long as she could see me, she would not scream bloody murder. She had not completely recovered but Dr. Adam was happy with her progress.

That man was a paediatric- cardiovascular surgeon and a child trauma specialist. Yeah, he only looked younger, he was thirty-two with double. M.D.

Robbie had to go overboard; Dr. Adam was too qualified to take care of Amelia??s fever. But I was thankful for him, Lia loved talking to him and after every visit I felt like, I was someone valuable and irreplaceable in Lia??s life. He asked me to follow my instincts when it came to Lia and I did not have to cross check my every decision with Dr. Adam as long as her wellbeing remained my main focus and goal. He said if it became too much to handle I could always depend on Robbie to give a fresh outlook.

I was worried about alienating Robbie because I was taking care of Lia so much that I was not giving him enough chances to bond with her.

Dr. Adam was not at all worried.

He said it was natural and healthy for one parent to back off a bit, if the other took the lead. He had even advised that to many new parents, in fact. Kids needed a growing space and a parent who was fun and bit slacked-off in discipline, helped them to wind off.

He found Robbie??s presence in the current situation was perfect but if I was feeling a bit worried I could always give them activities to do together.

He reminded me of his partner and his son, who got along just fine and his partner being a capable, responsible and amazing parent but still Dr. Adam was the primary care-taker. And they loved it that way.

??Ready, babies???

Lia cackled at her daddy??s question. ??DADDYYYY...??

??Oooh, who is this beautiful girl? Uh! No, she is not a girl, she is an Angel... So pretty...??

??Weally, Daddy??? She patted her head and Robbie kissed it.

??It will grow back fast, sweetheart. And you are so pretty. Always. Especially when you smile. So, give daddy a smile... Aaah! So pretty.?? He kissed both of her cheeks before taking my hand.

I was ready to shave off my hair too but Lia vigorously objected claiming it was pretty.

She was truly an angel.

She did not fuss when Robbie took his trimmer and shaved her pretty curls off; she sat on my lap and looked longingly at the lollipop daddy had bribed her. She could only eat it after the hair cut though. I was worried about the sugar rush, but... well, Robbie was right, she needed to have something to take the mind of her beloved hair.

We were going to my mom??s.

Dr. Adam suggested spending time with people who loved Amelia.

Mom was not feeling well enough for long travels these days. She was mostly taking rest, making Robbie and Jason handle everything in her office. I was happy that she was taking rest, but... she was always tired and drifting off to sleep in mid conversations.

But mom also looked so happy and she was glowing. Glowing like she was living her best time of her life. She was getting younger if I could say so.

I felt a kiss on my kiss and I expected Lia but not Robbie. ??Daddy, Lia is here.?? I whispered, looking for my kid and I saw her squatting down to poke on something on the ground. I picked her up before she could dirty herself.

??Uh ah! We are going to Grandma??s. We don??t want Princess to be dirty.??

I pushed away Robbie with my hip when he tried to kiss me again. Robbie took Lia from my hands, covered her eyes and kissed me so hard on my lips.

And I... melted... like butter. I just let it be... because it felt so good to be in his arms.

??Daddy, Lilil baby no see.?? Lia??s complaint broke us from our heaven.

??What has gotten into you??? I could not look into his eyes and I opened the car door, so Robbie could put our child into the car seat. I handed her the Barbie, and she started happily babbling to it.

I got in second and Robbie slid next to me.

??Let us go, Nick.?? Robbie slid his arm behind my shoulders and I snuggled to his body, eyes firmly on my baby girl.

I felt Robbie sniffing my hair and I closed my eyes savouring the feeling of his breaths.

??Tired???

??No.??

We did not talk much, but we were sitting close like we were sharing the secrets we wished no one else heard.

??Will Lia be happy with this? Maybe we should throw her a kid??s party. What do you think, Daddy???

??She looks happy now. But maybe later... after her fever has completely gone, we can try.??

I rubbed my face on his chest and he kissed my head again.

Mom would love to see us, especially Lia, she was really worried about my kid. Frankie was the one to open the door and came running to help Lia out of the car.

??Hello Miss Pretty Princess.??

??Weally, Funky??? Lia let Frankie pull her to a hug before talking his forefinger and walking to the house.

I was so worried about her worrying about her hair, or lack thereof. Why was she so sad about that? I squeezed Robbie??s elbow and he shrugged. ??It will grow back.??

He did not get it; it was not about the hair; it was about her being so sad about it.

Frankie and she were half way to the front door before he remembered us and came back running, with Lia on his hip.

??Oh my god. I am so sorry; I only saw Baby Amelia...??

??Don??t sweat it Frank, we don??t need any formalities.?? Robert patted the worried man??s back and I blew raspberry to him, faking sadness. But Lia started giggling and I smiled because that made me so happy.

??Let us go see Grandma Claire now. Come on.??

??Angel, you go inside, I have to take this call.??

I sighed, not at all happy. ??Daddy, you promised us. No work today.??

??Sorry, Angel. Just this one.??

??Be quick.?? I ignored his smile, before following Frankie and my baby.

Mom was indeed so happy to see us. She sat with us, and had tea and cupcakes, since we had already eaten breakfast. Frankie and were Lia giggling and talking to some insect they found on the garden. Then Lia came back to her Grandma, running, holding a yellow leaf.

??Gamma Gamma... loooook... so petty...?? She gave it to mom with a huge smile.

??Yes, dear, so pretty. Like my baby Amelia.?? Lia climbed on mom??s lap and mom kissed her forehead, before they started talking about leaves and flowers and my baby looked so happy.

I was surprised she did not ask mom if she really was pretty.

Mom started yawning and Frankie took my baby to the gardens to show her the baby tree saplings that he was growing.

I walked mom to her bedroom and helped her lie down.

??Mama, are you not taking the supplements I gave you???

She smiled. ??I am not taking anything.??

??But it is good for you.??

She sighed and leaned on the pillow. ??I just needed to lie down. See... I am all okay now.??

I did not know when I started talking... more or less ranting and complaining.

??... she is this small, mom, literally this small. How can anyone, ??anyone??, accidently push her down? Do you not understand, mama? She is this small.?? I placed my palm below my knee, so she was following me correctly. ??You have to squat down and then ??accidently?? push her like this, for her to lose her balance enough to fall. If anyone was standing, how can you just... Lia was standing at the third step, holding on the rail... and... she is...??

??Baby... it was an accident... Janice was the one who told Robert about her falling. Or he would have assumed she was just lying on the floor, crying. Are you telling me Janice purposefully pushed her down? She is her mother, Ace, not the best mother, but still a mother. She could not even deal with the guilt, so she had to stay away for a while.??

Yeah right! Guilt made her stay away!

??I am not telling anything. Just... makes no sense... that is all.??

??Did Lia talk about it???

??Yeah. She cried a lot, thinking I would be angry with her for climbing the stairs. I had banned her near that sad excuse of a stair, without me or Robbie. So...??

I was worried about her fall. I was worried she was in pain but was so scared to let me know.

We had been sleeping with Robbie for a few days now, but I always slipped out before Lia woke up, so I could take bath and have some time for myself.

A hot water bath in Jacuzzi would take away the tension I had from Lia??s restless sleeps. Robbie was with her and I could just float away from reality. I took my time to moisturize my body with the unscented ??goo?? Robbie had gotten for me, because he did miss me rubbing it all over my body, so sensually to drive him crazy.

His words, not mine.

It being unscented would not alter my natural addictive aphrodisiac sweat.

Again, Robbie??s words, not mine.

I got my goo; he got my scent. Win-win.

I was surprised to see my baby girl peeking at me from her daddy??s stomach when I came back from the bathroom.

She was awake half-an-hour early.

??Huh! Is my sweet baby awake? Ohh... she looks so happy and beautiful... my baby... come here, love...?? I climbed on the bed and pulled her to my lap; taking a wet tissue and cleaned up her nose.

??Let Daddy sleep??? She nodded and I took her to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth.

We did not go downstairs without daddy.

Ever since that incident, I depended on Robbie to take us up and down the stairs. Robbie padded the stairs under my request but I was still not happy, that stairs were not that safe.

Robbie made Lia climb up the stairs on her own while he waited patiently at the bottom; without my seeing. She would not climb much, five or six steps max. Robbie did not want Lia to be afraid of the stairs and he thought, this way she knew it was only to be done with Daddy.

I took her to her beautiful room and we went through different selection of her onesies before she opted one with a baby monkey holding a banana, in front.

We had stopped giving her morning baths, now I just wiped her down with a warm wash cloth to remove the dried up sweat she had from the night before.

She lied on her bed with her bare butt wiggling, talking to her plushies about ??Davey??.

??Sweetheart...?? How was I going to broach this topic?

??An an an an Davey sweetart??. She told her baby kangaroo plushy.

??Come here, you...?? I tickled her tummy and she squealed, screaming ??Davey??.

I kissed her adorable button nose and rubbed her back. ??Sweetheart... Baby and Davey are friends, right?

??Uhh huuhh.?? She nodded.

??Best Friends.??

??Bafrens.?? She agreed.

??And remember, how best friends tell each other everything???

She frowned. ??Tell???

??Yeah. Remember, Davey got a boo boo on his finger and Davey told baby.??

I showed her my finger where knife had nicked me, before. There was nothing on there, but she was so worried about the plaster on my finger, then. She might remember that.

??Owie... Boo boo kissie...?? She kissed my non-existent wound in remembrance.

??Yeah, Davey told baby about my owie and baby kissed my boo-boo.??

She nodded, still looking at my finger for owies.

??So, my sweetheart...?? I gently put my hand under her chin and made her look into my eyes. ??... if baby got any owies baby will tell Davey, yeah???

She agreed by vigorously. ??Baby tell owies.??

??Okay... So, tell Davey of owies. Yeah???

I gently squeezed her neck, with pressure, keenly focused on her expressions. ??Owie???

??No.?? She was confused; I could tell but I had to do this.

Her spine, next and I squished down the bubbling anxiety in my tummy. ??Owie???

??No...??

I continued until I had covered almost every points that could get hurt in her fall, and I did not know how much I was stressing over it, until it was all done and she was getting ticklish.

I dressed her up in the onesie she had selected after powdering her.

??Now, Amelia, who can see you nakey nakey???

??Davey, Daddy, JJ, Gamma, JJ an an Davey... an an an Daddy... oh oh oh... JJ... ohh Davey...??

??That is right. No one else can see you nakey-nakey and touch you or kiss you or...?? I pulled her to my lap and blew her a raspberry. ??Now, if anyone see you nakey-nakey???

??Tell Daddy.??

??That is my girl.?? I lied down next to her, pulling her to my chest. ??Sweetheart.?? She looked at me with those bright steel grey eyes and smiled. ??Why did you climb the stairs???

Her eyes widened in fear and then she started crying, screaming really and climbed on my chest... calling me Davey and... my heart broke at her not decipherable apologies.

??Sweetheart... look at me. Am I angry???

??Nooo... Davey... No angy... no angy... Noooo... Davey...??

I rubbed her tiny back and waited for the waves to calm down. She hiccupped and I kissed her a lot, calling her my baby and reminded her that I loved my Little Baby so much.

Then she was ready to talk and I got all these doubts in me that was not sitting well with me. She knew she was not supposed to climb up the stairs but Janice asked Lia to go to her room but when she tried to go there, Janice asked her go back and she fell.

That was what I could figure out, but Lia was physically fine and she was getting stronger each day. So, all my focus was to not let her be alone, without Robbie, Jason or myself.

??Ace.??

I jumped a little. ??Hmm???

Mom was looking worriedly at me. ??I lost you for quite some time, baby.??

??I am fine, mama, just thinking... about Lia. I have to make sure this never happens again. You might be right, but I am not taking any risks.??

??So what about classes???

Crap!

??I am not going back. I have to be with her. Lia is scared of my leaving and I would not put her through it ever again.??

Mom went silent. I knew she did not think of it as a good idea with my finals this close. ??Dean had called; he strongly suggests you to attend the exams. You are running for the valedictorian... you have the most marks of all the departments... even if you don??t write well, if you attend, you will pass. He is confident.??

??I am not going.?? I barely fought with mom but this was not an option. To put my little kid through this once again was inhumane.

She literally runs to me if I was more than five meter away from her. I had to put up a standing-high chair for Lia in the kitchen, to cook. Even then she would cry sometimes and I had to kiss her every few minutes to show her affection and prove my love.

No one would understand what it would feel like to see your child hugging your knees and cry, and there was nothing you could do but to repeatedly promise her that you were not going away.

Not going to put her through that again; I did not think I could put myself through that again.

??What does Robert say about your decision???

I was surprised at her question and I wondered why she was asking me that.

??We... we haven??t really talked about that... yet. Robbie is mainly focused on her fever going down and I think that is why he is not giving me a hard time on my decision. But I have made up my mind. I never wanted to go back in the first place. I knew she needed me and... Robbie will have to let me be.??

I should have followed my heart.

??Sweetie Pie???

??Mmm???

??About that... topic, you wanted to tell me... you can, only if you want... tell me now. Do you???

NO!

My heart skipped a beat and anxiety filled my core and sweat started to form on my upper lips. I felt my hands shaking.

But...

But....

But......

It was my momma. It was about my Robbie... about my Lia and about my future.

My life.

She had the right to know.

Jason knew.

Liz knew.

Dr. Adams knew.

Hell, even Olivia, Killian, and Natalia knew.

My mom did not.

My mom.

She did not know about the love of my life.

Especially since I was breaking and one day I would just crumple to dust and, this woman who gave birth to me, who pulled herself up when her husband - her soul - left her alone... for me... she had every right in the world to know.

I felt her hand taking mine and she pulled it over her heart.

??You can tell me anything, Son.??

??Can I???

??Yes.??

I had to hell her.

Especially, now.

I had these... emotions, if I could say so, for Robbie.

I had never felt these before and he had made me feel quite a few emotions, some even had no names.

Even during the times when I thought, I would ask him to leave Janice and be with me, did I not feel this deep rooted... passion? No, not passion. Love? Not love either, because I knew I loved him for a very long time. But something more strong... more... potent and more... more everything...

And I had no control over these.

I was getting drunk in the whirlpool of these emotions, were all I could think of was my family; him and my baby girl.

Did Robbie notice that change in me?

I did.

How I could not word out the protests I was supposed to tell him, how I could not help myself lean on him when he kissed me, how I willingly snuggled up with a barely-there tug from his side...

The protests would not leave my mouth.

Funny!

I would only notice I was supposed to protest after I had already melted and agreed wordlessly to his ministrations.

I... I had no idea what were those things in my heart.

I was supposed to push him away when he came into kitchen that day and pressed me to the counter to feel me up. I was not supposed to continue to stir the soup without even asking him to stop. I was supposed to chastise him for switching off the stove.

Instead...

I let him turn me around, let him kiss my neck, let his hands wander around under my shirt like it was his right and I just looped my hands around his neck and... the only words that left my mouth was ??Lia might see??.

As if I was only worried about her seeing us.

Funny!

I was only worried about her seeing us.

??We are only hugging.?? He whispered before lightly kissing my ears and pressed me closer to his strong and ripped body.

He took a deep breath before cussing out a word of want and pulled me deeper to his embrace, making me all kind of a needy slut inside. God! I could spend an eternity hugging him to my body. I bit my lips because of the pleasure coursing through my veins.

His grip was making me breathless. He knew how to drive me crazy. His face rubbing along my neck, his lips leaving wet kisses along the way.

How could a hug be this erotic? This was no hug; this was something more intimate... more possessive. This was above the sex we had.

We were sharing our souls and it was intimate and romantic and... definitely... definitely private.

No one should ever see us like this. This was sacred, this was precious and this was only ours.

Only ours to ??feel??.

No one had the right to watch this.

He panted to my lips with his eyes hooded and strange. When he dipped his head and kissed my lips, I parted them for his tongue to consume me.

And consume, he did.

I felt his need on my stomach and felt myself open, just like that. That my body completely agreed that it was its role to welcome him deep inside.

What was this emotion called?

Submission? No... Robbie was the one who looked submitted to me. His eyes, his whimpers, his wandering hands all screamed submission to me.

So dominance? Gods no! I was feeling all kinds of vulnerable right at that moment and I could not even control my body.

Love? No, I knew what love felt like, this was not it, because I could still feel love in my heart.

Something else.

??My Love.?? He whimpered and hugged me tighter and I hummed, as if I was indeed his love.

Then Lia came running, calling for her Davey and it was Robbie who extracted himself, stopping the soul mating we were under.

Yes! Not me.

Him.

I did not push him away.

Robbie had stopped... because our child had come in frantically searching for us. I had pulled his hand under the sink and washed them thoroughly with soap because his hands were roaming all over my sweaty body before doing the same with my young daughter.

Yes, my daughter.

What did that make Robbie?

My lover? My partner? My husband?

All these days we had been extremely close; it was like the times when we were labelled under ??friends??.

But this time sitting with him in the ottoman, watching the sea under moonlight, hearing him talk about his office employees and work, I was not wondering if he would kiss me. Because the moment his eyes slipped to my lips, it was followed by a heart touching kiss, so soft or if he was playful, a bite.

And I would just... scoot closer. Then Robbie would get worried that I was cold and cover me tighter with the blanket and of course his embrace.

He was becoming my everything and more.

And my mom had the right to know.

I had not known that I had closed the eyes reminiscing the events that made Robbie, my... Robbie.

He was my Robbie and that was that.

??Mama, I am in love.??

I heard a deep gasp, and my mom??s eyes filled with tears. Not sad ones, just so happy that I was in love.

I am sorry to break your heart mommy.

??I am in love with someone... I am not supposed to love.??

Mom nodded, giving me the permission to take time to collect my thoughts. I sniffled and mom kissed my palm still safely secured in hers.

??He... is my everything, mama. I want... him, in my life and... if there is something after that, I want him there too.??

??Oh!?? Mom??s lips wobbled, still not sad.

Just accepting.

Swallowing my sobs and it made my throat hurt.

??Say his name.??

??Please mama...??

??Shhh... tell mama everything, my beautiful child.??

My lips were spasming and I covered my other palm on it.

??Ro... Robert Brantley.??

She closed her eyes at the same time I did. And two beautiful tear drops that cleansed my soul flowed out through my cheeks.

I felt my mom??s kiss on the back of my hand again.

??Tell mama everything...?? How could she sound so strong while crying, why was her voice not broken?

I told her everything, told her the truth.

Except that one time, when he came to my room drunk because he was a demon and I did not want anyone, especially my mom, to judge him on that because I could not justify what he did, not even to myself.

Other than that, I told mom how we were a ??we??.

He was my life.

He was my hope.

He was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

There would never be anyone for me if it was not him.

He was my other half.

He was my man.

She nodded, accepting and trying very hard not to sob.

??You have known.?? I wondered.