Kael.
I woke up with a start, panting like I had just run several miles and shaking like I was having a seizure.
My clothes stuck to my skin in places that I felt were uncomfortable due to my pouring sweat, and my limbs trembled as I made my way out of bed and slipped out of my room.
The hall was quiet as I made my way through the house to the kitchen whilst basking in the goodness that was the chill of the night.
But did I feel as good as I would whenever I was having a night walk?
No.
Of course not.
Because I had just had a nightmare and this was the third time this week; which also meant that it was quite becoming too frequent now and I found that very frightening.
Would you however like to know what my dreams were always about?
No, I guess not. But I’ll tell you anyway...
It was about Leilani! Freaking Leilani!
It was always about her and it was crazy because she infuriatingly doesn’t want to have anything to do with me!
Every night before going to bed, I couldn’t help but think about her, her scent, her face... her long silvery hair. Goddess, I couldn’t help but pray fervently for her safety— even though I was not a saint that would usually pray.
But despite this, what I was met with every night was never her smiling face.
She was never happy or healthy or living freely whenever I dreamt of her. She was always in pain. In anguish. Bleeding. Or. Dying.
Goddess, only a few minutes ago, I’d literally held her tiny frame in my arms while she bled to her death, her cold trembling fingers smearing thick blood on my cheeks as she whispered the words; "Let me go," to my face.
I had been reluctant to let go, scared that if I did, then I would be losing her forever— and I wasn’t ready for that. But my cries, my screams did nothing to save her. Even my worthless attempts at resuscitating her had been fruitless.
I could still remember how pale she had looked. How shriveled her skin had appeared. Her blood had stained the snow a deep red, it was almost black; and I could also remember the sound of her heartbeat and how it had come to a stuttering stop.
"Can’t sleep?" A voice called out from the shadows, snapping me out of my thoughts which made me jump in shock.
I turned swiftly to the sound, my eyebrows lifting into my hairline when I saw Zevran hunched over the kitchen cabinet, his fingers wrapped around a glass containing whisky— the perfect depiction of a man who has lost his sleep.
When our eyes met, I noticed the worry creasing his features and the way he seemed as though he was deep in thoughts.
I leaned against the wall and crossed my arms over my chest, my voice detached as I answered; "Yes," I said, "I couldn’t sleep. What about you?"
At my words, he dropped his gaze and tilted his head backward to down the contents of his glass. "Same here." He drawled,
"Why?"
"Nightmares."
That singular word had my ears perking up. It had me leaning forward even before I could stop myself. My heart began to race for no just reason and my arms, once wrapped around each other, dropped as I rasped out through suddenly dry lips;
"Nightmares?"
"Yes," he answered without looking up. "I’ve been having them for days now, but today’s own... today’s own is a bit different. It felt a little too intense..."
"And then you decided to come and clear your head." I finished, not missing the way his shoulders slumped before he turned away from me.
"Yes."
"Did it help?" I continued, looking for an avenue to make myself feel slightly better, even though it meant interrogating him until I found out if we’re being plagued by the same demons.
His eyes couldn’t meet mine as he sighed dramatically, his shoulders slumping once more as he said; "No, I in fact feel worse."
"What was it about?" I asked and at my words, he stopped to stare at me, his face a mask of sheer worry.
He didn’t respond to me for what felt like forever and as the seconds ticked by and I soon began to feel the beginnings of desolation creeping up on me, he asked; "Why are you out, brother?"

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