The Seduction of Jac Frost (by Tatienne Richard) novel Chapter 112

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Jacqueline watched Bjorn in the corner of the pub where he had Dana sitting opposite him as he whispered to her whatever it was he spouted to get her to not run screaming from the pub.

“I don’t trust him,” Bar said quietly from next to her.

“Ditto,” Wilder said seriously.

“He doesn’t deserve her.” Bar lifted his beer to his lip no longer enjoying the Christmas carols which had resumed with the karaoke. “Why would she do this to me?”

Jacqueline looked at Bar sadly, “it’s not likely meant to be to done to you, Bar. This is about Bjorn.”

“It feels deeply personal,” Bar drank the beer to the bottom.

“I’m sure it does but consider that the Queen Mother didn’t

give him a mate until you found your second chance mate.” River said quietly.

“So, Jacqueline is some kind of appeasement?” Bar retorted angrily. “I get a second mate to make up for the one be killed

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so I don’t get pissed off over the fact he gets to have what he

took from me?”

“How can I help?” Jacqueline asked him, resting her hand on

his forearm.

“You know what?” he motioned at Wilder to move, “I need to go for a walk and think and get my head on straight.”

“Do you want company?” Jacqueline asked, her heart in her throat as her mate shut her out. She could feel the anger, the

stress, and the frustration in him through their bond but there

was also a deep longing and pain in him she was afraid to

acknowledge. Knowing he’d loved someone else with such

intensity and depth was unsettling for her. She knew it wasn’t right to be jealous of his past and yet being around Bjorn was bringing feelings to the surface for Bar and it was feelings she didn’t know how to help him navigate.

He seemed lost in his own misery as he almost scrambled over Wilder to get away and he was soon throwing open the door to the pub open and disappearing into the winter’s night.

“Hey,” Rafferty took her hand and kissed her knuckles, “these feelings he has doesn’t lessen the love he has for you.”

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“I know,” she said with a shrug, “but I can feel in here how

much he still loves her.”

“The heart doesn’t need to end one love to begin another,” River said quietly.

“Seriously, River, I’m fine. I just don’t know how to help him. He’s clearly hurting and I feel to blame or related to the pain somehow.” She twisted her lips, “can we go now?”

“Sure. We can go back to the cabin –” Rafferty started.

“No. We’ll go back to the room at the lodge,” Jacqueline said quietly. “Bar needs space and we’ll give him space.”

“He’s going to need us, Jacqueline,” Wilder protested. “He’s hurting.”

“He said he wants to be alone. When I want to be alone, I don’t need people crowding into my private and personal spaces. We’re going to respect his need for space, Wilder. It’s been a very long day. I need some sleep. He will know where to find us if he wants us, but he’s made it clear he doesn’t right now.”

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“Your pride is hurt because he –”

“Would you stop?!” she snapped at Wilder. “My pride is not hurt. My ego is not hurt. I’m literally listening to the words

and feeling the bond. He is a wounded bear right now and

he wants to be alone to lick his wounds. Did it not occur to

any of you he had a very difficult and complex relationship

with his own belief in the Queen Mother because she allowed

his mate to be murdered by her sister and his brother? Now,

in his mind, the Queen Mother is screwing with him again.

When he looks at me, he sees the link to the creator who has

caused him so much pain. We are bonded and I know he will

come back but he needs to sort through his own pain. I’m not

going to deny it’s leaving me unsettled and weirdly feeling like I’m not enough or not as good but that is my own feeling

to sort out.”

“He loves you,”

“I know. I also know I’m exhausted. We all are. I need to rest before I let my overactive imagination take control. I want to respect my mate’s wishes. I’m giving him space.” She got off the bench away from the group.

Wilder frowned, “okay, let’s go back to the hotel room.”

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The walk back to the lodge was quiet, River and Wraith trailing behind them as Jacqueline walked with Wilder and

Rafferty each holding one of her hands.

“This night did not turn out as I expected,” Wilder said suddenly as the lodge came into view.

“We had a wonderful evening until Bjorn showed up,” Jacqueline corrected, “but life happens. Is it odd that I’m

used to this? I actually feel more,” she searched for the word,

“relaxed because of the way it turned out. It’s like my entire

life I’ve never had this happy go–lucky life and when things go well like this, it feels like I need to hold my breath while I wait for the other shoe to drop. When the shoe drops I get

this sense of relief, like, okay, here I am, this is what feels

comfortable to me.”

“It’s not odd, Jacqueline,” Wilder answered quietly, “it’s sad and it’s cruel. You should not spend your entire life expecting the terrible to happen.”

“But it always has, Wilder. I’m not the kind of person who sees rainbows and sunshine and unicorns in my life. When things go well, I expect things to go sideways. Until very recently, my goal in life was to make enough money to cover medical expenses when whatever undiagnosed illness I had which 5/11

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made me turn blue finally started to take my life. For me, exhaling means the crisis is here and it’s time to deal with it.”

“And you think Bar going for a walk is a crisis?”

“I think Bar’s family, showing up, plotting against us, is the crisis. I think the crisis is not in Oberon wanting to imprison me to use me against my mother or the risk of King Jack needing to save Jacinta and trading me off or even Bar feeling guilty because he’s got a new mate that he’s claimed or Bjorn getting his mate when Bar is still mourning her. I think the crisis is our responses and behaviors and how we respond.”

“You think we’ll handle things wrong?”

“No. I think we’re going to come out on top, but my mother told me from the onset, this path I am on will not be an easy one. It’s going to hurt.”

“Love shouldn’t hurt, Jacqueline,” Rafferty said softly.

“It shouldn’t,” she didn’t add the rest, but they heard it loud

and clear.

It shouldn’t but it does.

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They walked through the lobby and up the stairs and she paused to give River a hug, “thank you for coming out with us this evening. I had a fun time singing.”

River squeezed her, “please don’t get too in your head. Your bond with Bar is special. He’s simply got a lot on his mind.”

“I know. We’ll be fine. I am fine.” She repeated the words again as if somehow it made them truer.

In Wilder’s room, she stood near the bed she’d slept in before and the frowned, “can we shove the two beds together?”

“You want to put two king sized beds together?”

“Yes. In case Bar comes back.”

“Not in case, when,” Rafferty commented as he and Wilder began moving the night table from between the beds and then started pushing them together.

“I’ll be right back,” Wilder said suddenly and disappeared

once the beds were close.

Jacqueline used her powers to bind the beds together so they

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wouldn’t separate in the night and then she went to the wardrobe to find something to sleep in.

“Here,” Wilder said as he popped back into the space. “This might help.”

“What is it?” she turned her head to look over her shoulder and Wilder was holding up one of Bar’s flannel shirts. Her finger reached for it. “Oh.”

“You’ll feel like he’s holding you and we’ll feel like we’re holding you both.”

She stood on tiptoe and kissed Wilder’s cheek. “Thank you. I

know I’m being silly with my feelings, but I guess, like Bar, I

need to get my head on straight. The best way to do that is

to sleep on them and figure out in the morning what our next

steps are. Hopefully, he’s come back to us by then.” She gave Rafferty a pointed look, “I know you want to check in on him but respect his privacy. Unless we’re feeling he is in danger or frightened, we will not interfere with him. Let him have his

space.”

“It’s hard.”

“I know but he asked for this and we’ll give it to him.”

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“He said he wanted to take a walk and think. He said nothing about us not going home together and he’s hurting and he’s alone. He’s going to go home and expect us there and we won’t be there and he’ll think we fucked off without him,” Rafferty expressed his frustration.

“Or he will think he asked for space and his mates gave it to him.”

“Or he’ll think we don’t need him and left him on his own.”

“Stop it, Rafferty,” Jacqueline chastised. “I am trying to respect his wishes. Do you think I don’t want to go to him?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I think because you’re scared if you go to him he’s going to say you aren’t as special as his first mate or that he doesn’t want this bond because he’s angry at the Queen Mother and Bjorn and Oberon and the world. You’re here, hiding in this room and we’re enabling this bullshit.”

“Rafferty, enough,” Wilder said seriously. “Fighting isn’t going to help. Bar made his choice when he said he needed space and went for a walk. He didn’t ask us to go with him. He didn’t ask us to go to his house. If you want to go to the cabin

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and wait for him, then go ahead but Jacqueline is right. It’s

been a long and exhausting day, mentally and physically. I’m

tired. She is tired. It’s time for bed. I want to hold my mates

and only one of them is here. I’m going to hold the one who is here and do my best to sleep.” He pulled the blankets back

on the bed, “in you go, Jacqueline.”

She crawled into the bed and then watched as Rafferty

adjusted the bedding on the other side and made it, so they

were all shared. He then moved to the balcony doors, pulled

them open and he took a small lamp off the desk in the room

and stretched the cord.

“You’re leaving a light on for him?” Wilder said laughing. “You

romantic fool.”

“I want him to know where we are.”

Jacqueline buried her face in the pillow and wished for sleep

to come soon because despite her wanting Bar to know

where they were, she was feeling more concerned that even though he would know, he wouldn’t come back to them. She knew her fear was irrational and contradictory to everything she’d said to Wilder and Rafferty yet as she lay there waiting for sleep to claim her, she kept one ear open, wishing and hoping for the sound of him returning to her.

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