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Ryan’s pov
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The moment the word left his mouth, I didn’t wait a second more and turned on my heel, striding out of that room like my life depended on it. I didn’t even care that all eyes were on me or that Gavin was following closely behind.
I only cared about one thing. And that thing is getting to Evie soon.
However, no matter how fast my footing was, it still felt like I was walking too slowly. Too damn slow.
My pulse pounded fiercely in my ears as it matched the frantic rhythm of my thoughts.
A son.
The words wouldn’t stop repeating in my head. They literally slammed in every corner and made Apex stir restlessly.
‘A son…ours.’ Apex said.
My chest tightened harshly as images I had never even lived through flooded my mind….Evie alone, looking terrified as she carried my child while I…..
While I stood beside another woman. The other woman being her twin sister Kimberly. A twin sister that could never compare to her. Three years…..I lost three years.
A low, broken growl rumbled in my chest as the pain tightened around my heart. It felt like a hand had pushed through my chest and gripped the organ, hard.
‘We should’ve been there,’ Apex snarled, his voice no longer untamed with rage but heavy…aching with pain. ‘She needed us.’
“I know,” I breathed out loud harshly as I dragged a hand through my hair until the strands were sticking out wildly. I pushed through the large doors and into the open corridor, my pace quickening. “I know….” I whispered broken.
Guilt clawed at my insides, cutting and unforgiving as it rooted deeper with every step I took.
She had been alone. She had been all alone. Without me. She had gone through everything without me. I wasn’t there.
I wasn’t there to hold her hand, hug her, kiss her and tell her she was beautiful every day. I wasn’t there when she gave birth. Or when my son had his first step. Nor was I present when he said his first word.
The thought tears something painful in my chest and I wheeze.
My pace quickened into a run, my boots striking harder against the ground as it I could somehow outrun the past. As if I could undo it. Goddess, I wish I could.
“You can’t go to her like this,” A voice suddenly utters a few paces behind me. Gavin.
Those words made me stop.
My body froze mid-step, shoulders rising and falling with heavy breaths. My fists clenched at my sides as I stared straight ahead, my jaw tightening before I spun around to glare at him. I stormed towards him, Apex rousing. “You fucking knew she was pregnant! You fucking knew I wanted her back-
“I didn’t fucking know you were serious!” Gavin snarls back. “I didn’t know your parents were trying to ruin your bond. I thought you did it on your own! I thought you chose power over her!”
The rage that had been burning so vigorously inside me flickered and calmed down a little. I tear my eyes away from his and turn around to start walking again but his next words stop me once more.
“You going to her like this, untamed and angry, will only further push her away,” He utters. ” Evie believed you tried to have her killed. She’s protecting herself from you. What do you think will happen if you just randomly show up in front of her like
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this? Steaming with rage and barely in control of yourself.”
His words settle over me. They were true, I know he was right but calming down felt like I was wasting more time.
She believed I tried to have her killed. Those words repeated and my chest squeezed painfully.
Of course she did. From her perspective…I rejected her, erased her from my life and then sent the warriors after her.
‘She hates us,’ Apex lets out a low painful growl. ‘ Maybe the asshole is right. Maybe we should calm down.’
I dragged a hand over my face and let out a shaky breath as I tried to steady the storm raging inside me. My claws had already started to push at my fingertips again but I reined them back in as I forced control over myself.
Apex calms down.
“What are you suggesting I do?” I finally breathed out as I tried to release the tension in my shoulders, turning to spare Gavin a glance.
Gavin studied me for a moment before carefully uttering. “Well you can start by showing up as someone she doesn’t have to defend herself against,”
My jaw tightened and he continued. “No shouting or grabbing her to demand answers the second you see her. Stay composed. She’s going to be angry at first, especially with me, seeing as I spilled the secret she tried her hardest to protect,” his voice lowers as his eyes swim with regret.
My heart hurt at that because Evie thought me a monster so much that she didn’t want me to know we have a son. If Gavin’s tongue didn’t slip….would I have ever known?
“But she won’t stay angry forever. When you see her… don’t touch her unless she lets you,” he utters and eyes me carefully as if waiting for me to lash out again. But I kept my cool even though I didn’t quite like his suggestions.
Gavin continued, watching me closely. “You don’t raise your voice. You don’t command her. You don’t corner her.”
‘We would never command her or raise our voice at her,’ Apex growls in irritation.
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