The Big Sky Alpha novel Chapter 145

145 The beginning of the very end

145. The beginning of the very end

FREYA POV

+25 Points

I’ve been helping get meat processed, get the walls reinforced, and making sure we have ample weaponry for when they get to us. I’ve also been helping Sasha in the infirmary. Some of the people my father brought here were pretty injured and malnourished. She’s been needing some help keeping up with the ones that she hasn’t been able to just fix up and send off like she did with my father.

I have been trying to spend time with Colt and the kids, but I just keep thinking about what my dad and Luke said about the attacks and torture they endured. I want to do everything I can to make

sure our pack doesn’t go through that.

My dad still won’t tell me what happened to my mom. I’ve tried to get Luke to tell me but even he

said it’s something he doesn’t think I need to know. That is what bothers me the most.

I went to visit my brother, but my dad was right. He’s here and he’s in one piece, physically. However, he is not the same man I saw the last time he was here. Whatever they did to him and his

family has left him very scarred. He’s not looney by any means, he’s just not speaking to anyone

and he’s doing nothing but working.

Kind of reminds me of what I’ve been doing. I didn’t even witness any of the things they’ve

witnessed and lived through, yet I’m still messed up about this. I just feel like if I knew what happened to my mom, to my sister–in–law and their kids, then maybe I could move forward, I just feel like I’m stuck in this state of denial about everything because I don’t really know fi I am sad, if I

am angry, if I need revenge, or what I need to be feeling right now.

I know that I am sad because I love my mother, and I don’t ever get to see her again. I never said goodbye I just said, “I’ll see you soon.” The last time I saw her. That aside though, I don’t know anything else that could tell me where the rest of me needs to be with her death.

I went to the pack house to try to eat something when Jessi found me.

“So, you haven’t really been around here much the last few days. What you been up to?” She asked.

“Just working. There’s a lot that needs to be done to make sure we don’t face the same end as

Blood Moon did.” I answered, not even looking up to look at her.

She walked over to my side, “Freya I need to talk to you. This isn’t healthy what you’re doing.” She

said.

I started getting upset, “I don’t have time for this Jessi. I just need to eat something really quick

and then I need to get back to work.” I answered, being very short with her.

I turned to leave the room with my plate, and she stood in front of me with her hands on her hips.

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143

14%. The beginning of the very end

I sighed, “Jessil am fine. I just need to work on making sure our pack is safe.”

“No Freya, you’re not fine. You’re barely eating, you’re not sleeping, you’re avoiding your husband and your kids, you’re avoiding me, you’re not okay.” She said sternly.

“This isn’t your place, Jessi. I am your Luna, and you cannot speak to me like this!” I roared out to her. I instantly regretted it, but I was angry. Part of me knew she was right but right now was not

the time for me to have this talk with her.

“Did you really just pull the Luna card on me? Your best friend, the one who has been with you through every hell since we were babies?” She asked, exasperation in her voice with a side tone of

total pain.

What the hell was I doing? I tried to stop myself, but I couldn’t. It’s like I wasn’t in control. I yelled

back to her, “I said I am fine, as your Luna, you will obey me. Leave me be and don’t ever speak to

me like this again!” I tossed my plate of food down on the counter next to me and I walked out.

I could feel the eyes on me. I didn’t care. I was beyond angry and hurt. I wasn’t angry at Jessi though; I was angry at myself. She’s not wrong, and I know this. I have known there’s been issues

with the way I’ve been handling this. I just couldn’t stop it. It was like the words flew out of my

mouth before my brain had a chance to stop my mouth from saying them. I felt the hurt in her

stare at me as I stormed out. I felt the judgement in the stares from the pack members as I walked

out. I could even feel Colt’s eyes on me, he’s probably even more worried about me now.

I ran out and went to an area where people don’t seem to be hanging out much behind the pack

house. I had to just find a spot to sit and calm myself. I knew I needed to go and apologize to

Jessi, but I was in no mental state to do that right now.

I had this odd urge to try to go visit the goddess. I’m not really sure why, but any time anything has

felt beyond my control she always comes to mind. I just felt like I needed her right in that moment.

I sat in the quiet and began to focus. It felt like quite some time had passed, but suddenly I felt a

different feeling in the air. Even before I opened my eyes, I knew where I was.

However, when I opened my eyes, the sight was almost unrecognizable. I was in front of the lake

where we usually meet. Only, it didn’t look like the lake. It was murky, the greenery all around was

dead, the sky was red, and the moon was gone. There was no sun either. It was not the same place

as I remember visiting with her.

I looked around trying to find her. Just like the last time I tried to visit her over a year ago, she was nowhere to be found. It didn’t look like this last time though. I guess it’s been over a year since I’ve tried to visit the goddess. A lot can change in that time.

I just have this eerie feeling like she is nowhere, like the goddess isn’t around anymore. Seeing this place, a place she once described to me as her favorite place that reminds her of where she lived

on Earth with the man she fell in love with so long ago, like this just didn’t feel right to me.

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4 14%. The begers of the pay and

After the time had passed and my time there was up, I felt myself coming back to reality. When I opened my eyes, I looked around me, and I realized that even here it feels like we’re all alone. It feels like tis could be the beginning of the very end

Domina Sacarius

I hope you’re all enjoying the little chapter dump I’m doing today #vote#