The Alpha and His Contract Luna (Lauren) novel Chapter 129
I wake with Iris plastered to my chest and my arms around her. I start to panic because I didn’t want her this close to me. I was about to gently push her away when her face catches me off guard.
She looks so peaceful. Like a beautiful, innocent angel sleeping. Her long lashes fan her face and she has a small cute pout. Looking at her right now, with her guard down, I want nothing but to protect her against all the evil of this world.
I try shaking off the sudden feeling. What the hell was happening? Where was my resolve to keep her at arm’s length?
‘You didn’t have a nightmare at night’ a small voice whispers in my mind.
I know it wasn’t Raya’s. She wouldn’t be happy nor would she point out that I had a peaceful sleep even after the roller coast of events that happened to me.
‘It’s because she was by your side’ the voice whispers again.
That’s not possible, right? There was no way that my unwanted daughter was the reason why I didn’t wake up drenched in my own sweat. It’s just impossible. In fact, I would have expected the nightmare to be worse because she was near me.
“Grace said you’re my mommy, are you?”
Her voice startles me. I look down to find that she was wide and was staring at me. Her eyes give nothing but given I’m used to hiding my thoughts and feelings, I see past her blank stare.
Behind those dangerous green eyes, is hope and longing.
I start to internally panic. What should I tell her? How should I answer her? Yes I was her biological mother but in this case I was just an egg donor.
I wasn’t sure I could be a mother to her given what her disgusting father did to me. I’m afraid that every time I look at her green eyes I will be reminded of him. That with time that will make me resent her.
Deep down I know it’s not her fault. That none of the things that happened were her fault but it’s hard to let go. It’s hard to separate her from her monster of a father.
‘Not all parts of her are Daniel’s, half of her is you, and you’re good’ the voice reasons.
Is that enough really? To believe that the part of my DNA that lives in her will override the darkness she inherited from her father. What if she becomes just like him? A monster. What will I do then?
“It’s okay if you don’t want to be my mother. I understand. Nanny used to say that I’m no good. That I’m useless that’s why my daddy and mommy left me”
My heart hurts at the sadness I hear in her voice. Why would a grown woman tell that to a child?
I find myself pulling her close to me. As soon as she is in my arms, she starts to silently cry. Her tears soaking my pajamas.
“Did your nanny ever hit you Iris?” I asks, afraid of the answer.
“Sometimes but not always.” she answers in a small voice. “Am I a bad girl? Is that why she was mean to me? Is that why dad left me with her and you don’t want me?”
I feel for her. No matter how I try to run from it, the truth is that she is my daughter whether I like it or not. And just like me, it seems that she has been through her share of torture and pain.
“No, you’re not a bad girl. You could never be a bad girl because you’re part of me, do you understand?”
Comments
The readers' comments on the novel: The Alpha and His Contract Luna (Lauren)
Finally I'm fucking done author please research heavy topics extensively before writing about them again. When you don’t you often end up victim blaming alot...
I don't even feel sad about Raya fuck her there’s allot of things that trauma is responsible for and letting the people you love die while you enjoy watching isn’t fucking one of them like the authors writing when it comes to these topics are fucking piss fucking put like the victim blaming the dismissal of valid feelings the excuses for the people who hurt her like eww don’t ever touch on subjects like these until you’ve done the appropriate extensive research on these topics. Then ill read your works that touch on these subjects again. The only reason I’m still here is cause ive already started the story....
I knew the goddamn therapist was a fucking weirdo...
Again the therapist is incorrectly saying what’s going on. If Raya took the empirical trauma it’d be Raya that she’d be talking to. Mayra took the emotional AND physical trauma of what’s going on and both Raya and Mayra are experiencing shared mental effects of that trauma with Raya experiencing the effects on the more angered and blaming side. None of this makes Mayra a terrible companion it actually makes Raya a terrible companion if you want to place blame....
Bruh can’t she just get the moon goddess to like give her a new wolf or remove her from the one she got ? She gone be human either fucking way with the way that bitch of a wolf be acting...
The therapist is fixing weird like she was doing so good till she fucking invalidated Mayra’s feelings towards her baby that was forced upon her by her realist that popped up before she was even done healing like what ? Its normal for victims to feel that way towards a rapper baby and what the therapist should have fucking said was yeah Mayra it’s normal to feel that way you’re still haunted by your rapport and haven’t yet healed and it doesn’t help that your daughter looks like him once healed you could make a decision on whether you want to be in her life as her mother or give her up for adoption it’s all up to you but for now you need to focus on healing before attempting to mother a child who looks like your rapist. In the meantime have your child stay with a trusted person so that you can heal and make the correct decision for yourself as a healed woman. But no the therapist says try loving her and being a mother to your rapists child right now even if you haven’t healed yet. Like huh ? You’re fucking weird and the author is weird for this as well. Maybe before writing about a touchy subject please do more research In terms of how to go about the aftermath of trauma and healing because this invalidated a lot of rape victims who hated their children before healing and coming to love and care for them without blame....
We’ll do e. I enjoyed every moment....
Danke :)...
The Mayra and Darren story, the ending…it’s like the book isn’t finished. And the typo on the vows need to be fixed, like it’s a copy and paste. They’re were errors, but it wasn’t a bad series. I truly loved Ren and Bash. Now, what about Krystal, the new Oracle....
I absolutely love Sebastian and Lauren’s story! I wish it didn’t end ?...